Is your child refusing to eat certain foods, gagging at new textures, or throwing tantrums at mealtimes? Picky eating is a common challenge many parents face, often leaving them frustrated and concerned about their child’s nutrition.
To help parents navigate these situations, we asked Dr. Kimberly Chew, a Principal Psychologist at AO Psychology, to share her insights on encouraging healthy eating habits while understanding the root causes of picky eating.
Common Questions About Picky Eating
Dr. Kimberly Chew addresses some of the most common questions parents ask about picky eating, offering a psychological perspective for children and practical guidance to make mealtimes more enjoyable for everyone.
My son (3 years old) refuses to eat rice but loves noodles. Should I be worried?
Perspective for Children
Preference for one texture over another is common. He may find noodles easier to chew or simply enjoy their taste more.
Guidance for Parents
Avoid making it a concern. Instead, introduce small amounts of rice in fun ways, like mixing it with noodles. Preferences change over time, so keep offering variety without pressure.
My child gags whenever they try new textures. Is this pickiness or a deeper issue?
Perspective for Children
Some children have heightened sensory sensitivity, making new textures overwhelming. Gagging is a reflex that may indicate discomfort rather than stubbornness.
Guidance for Parents
Observe if it’s a persistent issue. Gradually introduce new textures in small, manageable ways. Avoid force-feeding and allow the child to explore at their own pace. If extreme, consult a professional for evaluation.
How can I use the “food bridges” method to expand my child’s diet?
Perspective for Children
Food bridging involves introducing new foods that resemble familiar ones. This helps children feel more comfortable trying new things.
Guidance for Parents
Identify a preferred food and slowly transition to similar textures or flavours. For example, if a child likes crackers, offer whole-grain versions or homemade alternatives with slight modifications.
My child only eats carbs. How can I balance their diet?
Perspective for Children
Many toddlers prefer carbohydrates due to their mild taste and easy texture. Food preferences shift over time with repeated exposure.
Guidance for Parents
Keep offering a variety of foods in a no-pressure environment. Try mixing small amounts of protein or vegetables into their favourite carb dishes. Picky eating usually resolves with patience and consistency.
My child refuses to eat at all. Should I just let them go hungry?
Perspective for Children
Some toddlers may refuse food as a test of control, while others may genuinely not be hungry. However, forcing or withholding food can lead to unhealthy eating patterns.
Guidance for Parents
Offer balanced meals and let them decide how much to eat. Avoid turning meals into a power struggle. If they refuse, stay neutral and move on. Hunger will naturally guide them to eat at the next meal.
My toddler loves milk but refuses proper meals. How much milk is too much?
Perspective for Children
Excessive milk intake can fill a toddler up, reducing their hunger for solid foods. They may prefer milk because it’s familiar and comforting.
Guidance for Parents
Gradually reduce milk intake by offering it at structured times instead of on demand. Encourage balanced meals and provide water as an alternative. Maintain consistency without making it feel like a deprivation.
How can I introduce variety to my child who only eats plain rice and biscuits?
Perspective for Children
Children find comfort in familiar foods. They may reject new foods because of unfamiliarity, texture sensitivity, or a need for control.
Guidance for Parents
Introduce small changes gradually. For example, mix a small amount of a new ingredient into their favourite food. Keep mealtimes stress-free and positive. Modelling eating a variety of foods can encourage them to explore without pressure.
My child eats a lot one day and barely anything the next. Is this normal?
Perspective for Children
Appetite fluctuations are normal as toddlers grow at different rates and self-regulate their food intake. Some days they may be more active and hungry, while other days they eat less.
Guidance for Parents
Trust their natural hunger cues. Instead of focusing on daily intake, observe their food balance over a week. Avoid pressuring them to eat, and instead offer a variety of foods consistently. This builds a healthy relationship with eating.
My toddler only eats deep-fried fish and refuses other proteins. What can I do?
Perspective for Children
Preferences for specific textures and flavours are common. Your child may enjoy the crispiness of fried fish and struggle with the texture of other proteins. It could also be a sensory preference or habit.
Guidance for Parents
Rather than focusing on what they refuse, celebrate what they do eat. Slowly introduce similar textures e.g., baking chicken to achieve crispiness. Avoid power struggles, as frustration can create resistance. Encourage variety gradually while respecting preferences.
My child has tantrums at mealtimes when they refuse to eat. How can I handle this?
Perspective for Children
Mealtime tantrums are often about control rather than the food itself. At this stage, toddlers assert independence and test boundaries. They may refuse food as a way of seeking autonomy.
Guidance for Parents
Shift the focus from food battles to creating a calm environment. Set clear, low-pressure expectations, offer the food and let them decide how much to eat. Avoid reacting emotionally; instead, show consistency and patience. If mealtimes feel less stressful, children are more likely to engage positively.
My child refuses to drink water. How can I encourage better hydration?
Perspective for Children
Some toddlers may be sensitive to textures and sensations. If your child avoids water in both drinking and play, they might have sensory sensitivities.
Guidance for Parents
Avoid forcing hydration. Introduce water in engaging ways like using colorful cups, straws, or adding fruit for flavour. Hydrating foods like watermelon can also help.
Despite trying creative food presentations, my child still rejects vegetables. Any other tips?
Perspective for Children
Some toddlers need multiple exposures before accepting a new food. Others may reject veggies due to taste sensitivity.
Guidance for Parents
Keep offering vegetables in different forms without pressure. Involve them in food preparation or use dips to make veggies more appealing. Persistence and creativity help build acceptance over time.
About Dr. Chew
Dr. Kimberly Chew is the Principal Psychologist at AO Psychology. With years of experience in child psychology, she specializes in helping parents navigate childhood behavioural concerns, including picky eating. Dr. Chew provides evidence-based strategies to support healthier eating habits and foster a positive parent-child relationship during mealtimes.
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