Potty training: Who do I listen to?
Find out how to listen to people give you advice on potty training your child!
When it comes to potty training your child, there are all sorts of ideas, plans of action, old wives tales and opinions on the matter. But then, when it comes to raising a child, what aspect of the job doesn’t have an ample supply of such things?
What you’ll likely hear
About the time your child is nearing their second birthday, you’ll begin getting suggestions, hints and all sorts of advice on how to potty train your little one. Well-meaning individuals will tell you what to do, how to do it and when to do it. Some of this advice will come from co-workers, other mums in the neighborhood, your church or your preschool/daycare. These people, for the most part, are easy enough to ignore or smile at politely and move on. But when the advice comes from your mum, mum-in-law or the nanny, it’s not so easy to ignore.
What to do
The first thing you should do is listen to what is being said. Some mums have a real problem listening to advice about raising their children; translating advice into criticism. In doing so, these mums miss out on the wisdom and encouragement others have to offer. We’re a sisterhood of sorts, and should appreciate what can be gained by sticking together.
RELATED: The essentials of potty training
Potty training is often one of the trickiest tasks of parenting. It’s nice to be able to talk to other mums you know and trust about how they are or have handled this all-important milestone.
But on the other hand, there are those women who dole out advice out of arrogance and spite. Mums who are jealous of you for one reason or another or mums who just don’t like you, will offer ‘advice’ in a manner that is demeaning and belittles your parenting skills. When this happens, you need to let it go in one ear and out the other. That’s often easier said than done, but it must be done. Potty training can be frustrating enough without the added pressure of negativity, so just walk away with your head held high, the training undies in one hand and your child’s hand in the other.
The insistent do-gooder
When the pressure to potty train your child comes from someone near and dear, it’s not quite so easy to ignore. So when this happens it is important that you be honest about how you feel right from the start. Otherwise, the tension will mount and the adversity will end up being about a whole lot more than potty training.
Instead of letting this sort of thing get to you, say things like:
- We are talking about potty training and will get to it when we’re ready to.
- I appreciate your advice, but that sort of thing doesn’t work with Junior.
- That doesn’t sound very effective to me. I would feel uncomfortable with that.
- I think I’ve done a pretty good job so far, so I think I’ll stick with the plan we’ve come up with.
- I’m not too sure about that, but if my ideas don’t work, I’ll give it a try.
RELATED: The no-no’s of potty training
Keep it to yourself
If you don’t want the opinions and ideas of certain people, avoid the topic. Don’t talk about potty training your child until you are talking about the fact that they are now out of diapers. Or if the subject comes up, a brief answer such as ‘We’re getting there.” will suffice.
Did these tips help you? For more on potty training tips, watch this video: