Growing up in Singapore, many of us have had private tutors hired by our parents during our school days. Back then, our greatest fears involving them were likely that the tuition wouldn’t help us improve our grades, but local actress Ya Hui had a very different concern when a male tutor she had in secondary school touched her inappropriately, masking it as encouragement.
“Whenever I answered a question correctly, he would touch me here,” the 36-year-old revealed in an interview with 8world, gesturing to the side of her breast.
Ya Hui added that it had happened “quite a few times” and she told her mum then: “Why does he have to touch me there? Because I feel extremely uncomfortable.”
Her mother then replaced the tutor.
She also discussed how, early on in her career, she did not “dare to do anything” when male clients got too touchy with her.
“At big events, the men used to place their hands on my shoulders or on my waist during photo-taking sessions, which was extremely uncomfortable for me,” Ya Hui explained. “If a man respects a woman, he wouldn’t do that unless they were already close friends or colleagues.
“But these were clients you’d only meet once, and what they did would make you uncomfortable.”
Now that she’s 15 years into her showbiz career, Ya Hui has ways to avoid such untoward contact.
“Nowadays, if someone touches my shoulders, I will be very obvious and shrug them off while saying, ‘Sorry I need to adjust my clothes’ and slip away,” she said.
She also had advice to give to others facing similar situations.
“You must say it if you know something is wrong or someone is making you feel uncomfortable,” she said, telling others to say directly: “I beg your pardon, but can you not put [your hands] here?”
“Because if someone has the intention to take advantage of you, they will feel uncomfortable [if you say it],” she added. “But if you don’t say anything at all, you may give them the chance to take advantage of you.”
Ya Hui also urged people not to “suffer in silence and wait for someone to speak up for you”.
“You should rely on yourself,” she said.
This article was first published on AsiaOne and republished on theAsianparent with permission.
