For many couples, the first 10 years of marriage is amazing. It's a time wherein they discover themselves and their spouses, and they feel more connected with each other. It's also full of firsts, as couples start a family and have kids.
According to a study conducted by Brigham Young University in the US, a lot of couples start to have a communication and relationship breakdown right after they get married, and it only gets worse every year.
However, once you and your spouse make it past 10 years of marriage, it'll all be smooth sailing!
Why do marriages break down?
The important thing for couples to consider is that being married is completely different from simply dating. You and your spouse's routine might not change, but your responsibilities change. Once you have kids, even more responsibilities and problems are piled on top, which can cause a huge rift in your relationship.
Most married couples start a family within the first 10 years of marriage and having kids, though fun, is also a stressful situation. All of those sleepless nights, taking care of the baby's needs in the morning, and making sure that their child grows up properly, can add to the stress in a relationship, which can cause couples to have problems, especially during the first 10 years.
This is also the time when couples tend to argue about the most trivial things, and in some cases, tensions can be really high at home. Even forgetting to take out the trash, or the responsibility of who changes the diapers starts to become constant points of arguments for couples, and it's not healthy behaviour.
Being married isn't all fun and games, it involves a lot of work and dedication, and couples need to understand that it has it's highs and lows.
What can couples do for their relationship?
Now, you might be asking, "What can couples do to avoid these problems?" The simple answer? You can't.
It happens to even the best and sweetest couples. It's totally normal, and the only way for your marriage to survive would be to just take everything in stride and look on the bright side of life.
Yes, taking care of a crying baby is stressful, and changing diapers isn't fun. But watching your baby laugh and smile whenever you're around just makes it all worthwhile. You and your spouse might not be as sweet as when you were younger, but now you have your own family, and you're closer than ever, even if it's not just limited to romance.
You and your spouse's lives are now intertwined, and it's a wonderful thing to share your life with someone that you know is worth sharing your life with. You'll fight, and argue, and sometimes you'll sleep on the couch. But it's all a part of how life is.
Once you're over the 10-year slump, you're in for the best years of your life. Everything will seem comparably easier, and slowly, you and your spouse will find more time to yourselves. So if you're currently having problems in your marriage, don't fret. Work it out with your spouse, and everything will fall into place. It always will, so long as you want it to.
Source: Telegraph
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Republished with permission from theAsianparent Philippines.
