Funny baby names

Written by Puni Mano

Naming your child can be a very exciting process. Here is a list of funny baby names that may or may not be well-intentioned. Read on and laugh.

shutterstock 62604862 Funny baby names

Back in college, I used to know a fine fellow called Hariharan (popular Indian name after a God), or Hari for short. The hours I spent making fun of his name, it could have got me into Harvard had I used it wisely! From “hairy” to “hari hurry up”, from absurd rhymes to the blatantly stupid. I shamelessly made fun of him so much.

Now this brings me to the point, why for the life of you, would a parent give funny names to children? Forget Shiloh (of Brangelina fame) or Apple (Gwyneth Paltrow’s daughter), let’s celebrate our Asian culture and discover some funny Asian names as well as regular Western names.

Funny Names popular with South Asians

Darriah (a popular Indian name) – Yes we all do not know how to spell diarrhea, but it sure sounds like that!

Hardick (a Hindi name) – try splitting the word in half. At least the owner of this name won’t have trouble attracting the women.

Pinky  (Popular Indian nickname– Smells suspiciously like a dumb blonde. This girl’s never ever going to be invited to MENSA. If we don’t have a bluey or a greeny then why in the world is there a pinky?

Sukhdeep (popular Punjabi name– once again you can split this unfortunate fellow’s name in half and let your imagination run wild.

Funny Names Popular with the Chinese

Dick – Absolutely self-explanatory

Fanny – I’m refraining deliberately from going into details

Phyllis – Congratulations Phyllis, you’re Syphilis free.

Harry – It’s terrible when you have hairless legs and are called Harry.

Chastity – Yes, I’m sure she’s going to have a brilliant sex life

Funny Names Popular with others

Dough – You name your child the first five letters of doughnut. Really, do you expect the poor child not to be fat?

Jesus – Now why, why would you want to call him that? “Jesus! Jesus, can you stop misbehaving”

Vodka – Unless you’re Russian, please!

Facebook – Who can forget the Egyptian dad who named his firstborn girl Facebook in a tribute to the social media site’s role in his country’s political revolution? Good thing FB was not a short fad.

Justin Case- Err, “just in case” you’re wondering–this list is a “not-to-name-your-kid-with-these-names-list. So, don’t get inspired.

Jo King– Seriously? Hey, it’s short for Joseph King or Joanne King or Jolene King…

Will Power– You got to love this one. We do! He will go far in life but first, your family name must be “Power”.

Teresa Green–Yes, tress are not blue.

Barry Cade– This one can’t be for real, right?

The list can keep going on and on. However, I do have limited friends and I’ve made fun of most of them here already!

In the Austin Powers movie “Goldmember” it’s all about the scene when Austin Powers meets nubile Asian twin girls named, “Fook Yu” and “Fook Mi,” and delightfully banter about their names — names which take on new meaning when translated into English.

The name joke was a hit with the film’s audience but also touches on the pulse of an evolving trend among real-life Asians and their self-consciousness over poorly translated names.

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