Thane has landed!

Thane has landed!

Li-Anne shares her labour story with

I have done it again, had an epidural-less labor not by choice (again), but because my doctor is pro all things natural. So how did it go this time?

7th december

Still 2 weeks to the expected delivery date. Was feeling tired and achey all over after yet another sleepless night, and wondering when he will actually pop.

12noon: Terelle went off to school with Yiling and Kirsten

1230pm: Had a meeting at home with my editor, promised him to do some work during my confinement month. On hindsight now, i was really thinking too highly of myself. I didnt even have time to sleep, let alone write!!

2pm: Drove to Woodlands to meet hubby for lunch and wait for Terelle to finish school

3pm: Tucking into my burger and msg laden shaker fries and joking with friends over sms that i hope today would be the day cos its a nice date - 071207! Coincidently Terelle was born on 050405

330pm: Picked Terelle up and headed over to gynae's clinic for a checkup

430pm: Gynae did an internal exam and commented in all seriousness that i was already 2 cm dilated and that he had just hastened my labor by bruising my cervix and hence triggering contractions; adding, in the same breath that he didnt mean to do so. Ahhhhhh!!! Its time!!!??

5pm: Strapped to the ctg machine to monitor contractions, continued sms-ing friends

530pm: Back in waiting room where a first time mum seated next to me commented on my apparent "cool" demeanor, when I was about to deliver anytime. Hell, i was freaking out inside! BUT to keep my pride intact, i continued to smile through her praises.

545pm: Doctor took one look at the ctg readings and proclaimed that I would be delivering by midnite tonight. Whoa...sweaty palms, clammy forehead...i feel faint already...

630pm: Headed home to do some last minute packing and take a shower, doctor told us to check into the hospital by 8pm

7pm: Hubby leisurely made a bowl of noodles to eat and kept offering me some. (Note: 2nd time round, not at all flustered)
I had absolutely no appetite, all i could think of was that a watermelon would be bursting out of me in less than 5 hours time.

730pm: Contractions started, as with Terelle, i labored with my back, feeling like i was being sliced into two each time the contractions hit

8pm: Had a CLASSIC BIRTH MOMENT in the car and as usual it had to do with hubby. I was groaning in pain in the backseat and urging him to drive faster to the hospital. "Im in pain!!" I yelled. The good man just had to choose that exact moment to ask "Errr what kind of pain ah?" DUH!!

Pain means pain!!! U mean there are different kinds??!!

2 years ago, hubby had an equally classic birth moment. While i was in the throes of pain at the height of my labor with Terelle, i requested that he massage my back to relieve some of the pain. After 5minutes of frantic rubbing, he plaintively bleated that his hand was painful. Hello? reality check? Who is the one in more pain???

But i digress...

830pm: Finally made it to the hospital without me killing him along the way. Handed Terelle over to my parents and sister and hobbled into the delivery wards

9pm: All prepped and waiting for the pain to intensify. At this moment the nurse came in, took my temperature and commented that i was running a fever. Shucks! Must be because of Terelle's flu bug! Had to have a plug inserted into my vein and antibiotics pumped into me to protect the baby. Ouch...i hate the plug! Whenever you forget and accidentally brush your hand against something, it yanks at your vein, causing pain in yet another part of my body which i really dont need right now.

Nurse did an internal exam: 4cm dilated

930pm: Nurse checked again, still 4cm. Made a call to the doctor who arrived in a couple of minutes. Doctor tried to distract me by talking to me while he did an internal check again. I didnt realise he was actually breaking my waterbag! To my surprise, there was a loud pop sound after which the clear fluid flowed steadily out. Ashen faced from the pain i turned to hubby for comfort. He was equally ashen faced and blabbering "He inserted a hook inside...a HOOK!!" comfort from there...

945pm: Contractions fast and furious now. Sucked on the gas like there was no tomorrow, all the while trying to remember nors' advice at the back of my pain muddled brain. (Thanks dear!) I held on so tightly to the gas mask that at one point i actually yanked it off the wall, and was wondering why the gas wasnt working as well as it should. Why the hell wasnt i drifting off into that out-of-body trance?

10pm: Nurse came and did another check, just 5cm dilated. What??! Things dont seem to be moving along fast enough. She offered a pethidine jab to relieve more of the pain so that i would be more relaxed and hence make labor progress faster. Yes yes whatever! Just gimme something for the pain!!

1020pm: High on the gas, with each contraction i was mumbling "no more no more, this is the last one", to the amusement of the nurse assisting me. Coincidently, she was the same one who helped while i was laboring with Terelle!

As the urge to push intensified, i heard the nurse start to page for good ol doc. She kept telling me not to push and that, i felt was worse than the actual contractions. Imagine the feeling of trying to hold in a huge bowel?? one word - DISTRESSING!

Within minutes my savior was here, strapping on his boots and rubber suit with a flourish. He cheerfully declared, "ok you can push now!" what sweet words to my ears!

In the most unglamorous position yet again; feet propped up in stirrups, spread wide apart, I remember looking at my toenails and thinking irrelevantly: my pedicure looks nice! Good thing I had it done just a week ago!

But then the pain sweeps over me again, the gas mask is yanked from my lifeless hands and I am urged by 3 disembodied voices to PUSH!

I bear down hard, nothing happens.

Deep breath, bear down again. Was that a distinct snip i heard down south? i dun want to think about it.

Push! Hard. Why is it taking so long? This is even harder than Terelle's birth!!

By the 4th or 5th push i hazily remember screaming to the doctor to "just suck the baby out of me pleeeeeeeease!!"

Doctor obliges by setting up the vacuum and one push later, my son emerges in a wet rush.

I am exhausted and lay back against the pillows and refuse to move another muscle even as my squirming, piping hot baby is laid on my chest. Vagely i remember the doctor exclaiming," Whoa this little guy is big! Much bigger than what we scanned at the clinic!"

Of cos he is big, i bet it is a war zone down south.

Thankfully doc proclaimed that because he made a small snip, the wound was clean and i would heal marvelously.

Only after the effects of the gas had worn off was i able to admire my son. My son! My chubby little bub! Coolly messaging friends and relatives to inform them of his arrival, i was oblivious while doc stitched me up. While most would cringe at the thought of a needle pricking at your most sensitive regions, let me reassure you that absolutely no pain can compare to the pain of a drug free (well almost) labor.

And while doc was at his gory task, another classic birth moment happened. A moment which i will forever regale my frens with. Doc suddenly sneezed straight at me while he was doing his stitching. If that wasnt horrifyingly icky enough, he actually used his sleeve (bloody, mind you) to wipe his nose!

Gosh, can u ever be that blase about childbirth??!!

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