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Resolving Relationship Problems After Having a Baby: Tips for Rebuilding Connection from Mental Coach

3 min read
Resolving Relationship Problems After Having a Baby: Tips for Rebuilding Connection from Mental Coach

In this chapter of the ‘Ask the Expert’ series, Audrey Loo, a mental health coach, gives tips to new parents in overcoming relationship problems.

Having a baby is a life-changing experience that can bring joy but can also strain relationships. Audrey Loo, Naluri Mental Health Coach, answers common questions about strengthening your bond with your partner during this transformative time. See the thread for full conversations.


Q: Is it normal to dislike your husband after having a baby?

Audrey Loo: Yes, this is common. Your focus naturally shifts to caring for your baby, and differences in parenting styles can lead to conflicts. Remember that you’re on the same team. Try to see your husband’s perspective and give his way a chance—you might be pleasantly surprised!


Q: Why do women feel emotionally disconnected from their husbands after having a baby?

Audrey Loo: Hormonal changes, sleep deprivation, and the stress of adjusting to a new life can contribute to emotional disconnection. If this feeling persists and extends to others, seek support from your community or a professional, as it could indicate postpartum depression or anxiety.


Q: Is there a connection between postpartum depression and relationship issues?

Audrey Loo: Yes, postpartum depression can cause emotional disconnection, leading to feelings of loneliness and strain in relationships. It’s important for spouses and families to educate themselves about postpartum mental health and seek available resources in Singapore.


Q: Should we still do regular date nights after having a baby?

Audrey Loo: Yes, absolutely! Time and energy may be limited, so set realistic expectations and find creative ways to connect. This could mean doing chores together or taking five minutes each day to check in with each other.


Q: How can we build a better relationship after childbirth?

Audrey Loo: Strengthen your bond with these tips:

  1. Acknowledge change – It’s normal to grieve your pre-baby life, but don’t forget to celebrate your wins as a couple.
  2. Find humour – Laughing together helps you navigate tough moments.
  3. Maintain physical intimacy – Even if you’re not ready for sex, hugging and kissing can go a long way.
  4. Spend quality time – Even five minutes of meaningful conversation each day can make a difference.

Q: Does having quality time together help resolve relationship issues?

Audrey Loo: Definitely. Spending protected time together fosters meaningful conversations and strengthens your bond. However, it’s crucial to communicate respectfully and honestly during these moments.


Q: How can I reignite the spark in my relationship after having a baby?

Audrey Loo: Try these tips:

  1. Find humour – Laughing together strengthens your relationship and lightens tough moments.
  2. Stay physically connected – Hugs, kisses, and other forms of intimacy rebuild closeness.
  3. Prioritize quality time – Check in with each other daily, even if it’s for a few minutes.

Q: I don’t have enough time for my husband because of the baby. How can we reconnect?

Audrey Loo: Reconnecting takes effort but is possible. Here’s how:

  1. Spend quality time together—whether it’s a date night or a family outing, make it meaningful.
  2. Find humour in your daily lives to stay close during stressful times.
  3. Maintain physical intimacy to rebuild emotional and physical closeness.

About Audrey Loo

Audrey Loo is a Mental Health Coach at Naluri, specializing in helping couples navigate challenges in their relationships and mental health. With a compassionate approach, Audrey provides practical strategies for building stronger connections and overcoming postpartum struggles.


Final Thoughts

Navigating relationship challenges after having a baby requires effort, understanding, and a sense of humour. By communicating openly and spending intentional time together, couples can build stronger, more resilient bonds.

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