X
theAsianparent Logo
theAsianparent Logo
Product GuideSign in
  • Awards
    • Parents' Choice Awards 2023
  • Pregnancy
    • Due date calculator
    • I'm pregnant
    • Trying To Conceive
    • Labour
    • After birth
    • Baby loss
  • Parenting
    • Parent's Guide
    • Relationship & Sex
  • Child
    • Newborn
    • Baby
    • Toddler
    • Pre-Schooler
    • Kid
    • Pre-Teen & Teen
  • Feeding & Nutrition
    • Diseases-Injuries
    • Breastfeeding & Formula
    • Meal Planner
    • Health
    • Allergies & Conditions
    • Vaccinations
  • Education
    • Pre-School
    • Primary School
    • Secondary School
    • Primary School Directory
  • Lifestyle
    • Money
    • Travel & Leisure
    • Fashion
    • Home
    • Fitness
    • Contests & promotions
  • News
    • International
    • Health
    • Celebrity
    • Singapore
  • TAP Recommends
  • Shopping
  • Press Releases
  • Project Sidekicks
  • Community
  • Advertise With Us
  • Contact Us
  • Become A Contributor
  • VIP

What You'll Miss About Being The Parent Of An Only Child After Baby Number 2 Arrives

5 min read

There is no steeper learning curve than that of becoming a parent for the first time. But going from being the parent of an only child to having two children presents its own challenges.

In fact, having welcomed our second child last year, I actually found the transition to two children even more challenging than going from zero to one.

Sure, becoming a mother the first time around was intense. But nothing prepared me for just how stretched I would feel managing the needs, wants and demands of two little humans.

As a result, there are a few key things I now miss about being a mum of one versus a mum of two.

Parent of an Only Child? 3 Things That’ll Happen After Baby #2 

parent of an only child

Image source: iStock

1. No more naptime = less you time

Pre-baby number two I thought I was busy. So very busy. Juggling work, a boisterous toddler, a marriage, friendships, extended family, a household.

But one guaranteed respite throughout the day was the two/two-and-a-half-hour break I would get while my firstborn napped. These were my power hours. Where I ploughed through the work to-do list, life admin tasks, housework or (gasp!) read the odd book (OK, scroll Instagram).

The house was quiet and peaceful, those couple of hours stretched out ahead of me where I could just be me, instead of mum, and after a hectic morning, would help me recharge for an equally busy afternoon.

Now with a second child in the mix, and my three-year-old having thrown in the naptime towel the moment I came home from hospital with baby number two, there is simply no opportunity for some downtime throughout the day.

No sooner have I got the baby down for their nap that my three-year-old is pouncing upon me for requests to play, feed or entertain him.

I now understand why some parents extol the benefits of a close age gap between siblings… at least that way they’re able to hang onto those precious naptime hours (when both kids are asleep) that little bit longer!

2. No longer marvelling at the milestones

parent of an only child

Image source: iStock

It’s a truism that there will always be slightly less photos of second-born children than firstborns in their early years. Their baby book isn’t as comprehensively filled out and most outfits are hand-me-downs.

Parenting the second time around the novelty factor over every little thing your new baby does wears off just a little, as you’ve been through it all before.

As you’ve now moved onto bigger milestones with your eldest – toilet training, transitioning from cot to bed and even starting kindergarten – you just don’t have the time or wherewithal to marvel at every developmental leap your second child makes.

With your attention divided between two kids, you also have less opportunity to simply gush over every little yawn and stretch your newborn baby does.

I spent countless hours doing floor time with my firstborn, reading him baby books and singing songs. Unfortunately, my second child hasn’t received quite so much attention as there seems to be no end to the daily to-do list when caring for two.

Thankfully, we’ve had some extra grandparenting help of late, which has allowed me to devote much more one-on-one time to baby number two… and even marvel over a few yawns and stretches!

3. Not being able to give your all

parent of an only child

Image source: iStock

Before falling pregnant with my second, what gave me pause before taking the plunge to go from a family of three to a family of four, was how it would affect my relationship with my firstborn.

I loved becoming a mother, and for three years my eldest was my little sidekick, my mate, my best friend. I was scared of losing that bond, and worried how he would respond when he saw me devoting so much time and energy to another baby.

However, I also recognised that learning to share – whether toys, space or Mummy – was actually good for his emotional development.

In hindsight, having the ability to give my complete love and attention to just one child feels somewhat of a luxury. And certainly being able to give my “all” was made easier by the fact that with just one little one to contend with, there was still plenty of time for “me”, as well for my husband and I as a couple.

Even so, now that there’s double the trouble in our household, there’s also double the amount of hugs, kisses and laughter.

Partner Stories
Facing Parenting Challenges? Help is at Hand. Just Reach Out.
Facing Parenting Challenges? Help is at Hand. Just Reach Out.
Parenting Lesson from a New Mum - Don’t Try to Do it All on Your Own!
Parenting Lesson from a New Mum - Don’t Try to Do it All on Your Own!
Celebrity Dad Mark Lee Shares the 3 P's of Raising School Going Children - Parenting Tips, PSLE Preparation & Protecting Your Child’s Eyesight!
Celebrity Dad Mark Lee Shares the 3 P's of Raising School Going Children - Parenting Tips, PSLE Preparation & Protecting Your Child’s Eyesight!
Bathroom Cleaning 101: A Complete Clean in Just 5 Minute Featuring Tips from Zoe Raymond
Bathroom Cleaning 101: A Complete Clean in Just 5 Minute Featuring Tips from Zoe Raymond

Sure, there are things I miss about being a mum/ parent to an only child, but so much more has been gained by expanding our family. Although, I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready to make the leap from three to four!

This article was first published in KidSpot and republished on theAsianparent with permission.

ALSO READ:

Is There A Difference Between Firstborn And Second-born Parenting?

This Mother Explains Why It’s Fine To Have Just One Child

Study: Challenges Of Raising ‘The Second Child’ Especially If Its A Boy

What Youll Miss About Being The Parent Of An Only Child After Baby Number 2 Arrives

Got a parenting concern? Read articles or ask away and get instant answers on our app. Download theAsianparent Community on iOS or Android now!

img
Written by

kidspot

  • Home
  • /
  • Parenting
  • /
  • What You'll Miss About Being The Parent Of An Only Child After Baby Number 2 Arrives
Share:
  • 14 Parent-Child Activities In Singapore To Foster Kids' Thinking Skills!

    14 Parent-Child Activities In Singapore To Foster Kids' Thinking Skills!

  • Should You Have A Second Baby? 5 Questions You Need To Ask Yourself First!

    Should You Have A Second Baby? 5 Questions You Need To Ask Yourself First!

  • Wife Forgives Husband Who Had Two Affairs And Got A Woman Pregnant

    Wife Forgives Husband Who Had Two Affairs And Got A Woman Pregnant

  • 'Family is Priceless': Malaysian Man in Singapore Rents 2 Buses So He and 60 Other Strangers Can Join Their Families for CNY

    'Family is Priceless': Malaysian Man in Singapore Rents 2 Buses So He and 60 Other Strangers Can Join Their Families for CNY

  • 14 Parent-Child Activities In Singapore To Foster Kids' Thinking Skills!

    14 Parent-Child Activities In Singapore To Foster Kids' Thinking Skills!

  • Should You Have A Second Baby? 5 Questions You Need To Ask Yourself First!

    Should You Have A Second Baby? 5 Questions You Need To Ask Yourself First!

  • Wife Forgives Husband Who Had Two Affairs And Got A Woman Pregnant

    Wife Forgives Husband Who Had Two Affairs And Got A Woman Pregnant

  • 'Family is Priceless': Malaysian Man in Singapore Rents 2 Buses So He and 60 Other Strangers Can Join Their Families for CNY

    'Family is Priceless': Malaysian Man in Singapore Rents 2 Buses So He and 60 Other Strangers Can Join Their Families for CNY

Get advice on your pregnancy and growing baby. Sign up for our newsletter
  • Pregnancy
    • Baby
    • Education
    • Events
    • Allergies & Conditions
  • Family Occasions
    • Breastfeeding & Formula
    • Child Safety
    • Health
    • Diseases-Injuries
  • Lifestyle
    • Home
    • Money
    • Feeding & Nutrition
    • Diet & Weightloss
  • Normal Delivery
    • Cesarean Delivery
    • Behaviour
    • Secondary School
    • Formula Feeding
  • Ages & Stages
    • Latching & Concerns
    • Festivals & Holidays
    • Education
    • Pre-teen & Teen
  • More
    • TAP Community
    • Advertise With Us
    • Contact Us
    • Become a Contributor


  • Singapore flag Singapore
  • Thailand flag Thailand
  • Indonesia flag Indonesia
  • Philippines flag Philippines
  • Malaysia flag Malaysia
  • Sri-Lanka flag Sri Lanka
  • India flag India
  • Vietnam flag Vietnam
  • Australia flag Australia
  • Japan flag Japan
  • Nigeria flag Nigeria
  • Kenya flag Kenya
© Copyright theAsianparent 2023. All rights reserved
About Us|Team|Privacy Policy|Terms of Use |Sitemap HTML
  • Tools
  • Articles
  • Feed
  • Poll

We use cookies to ensure you get the best experience. Learn MoreOk, Got it

We use cookies to ensure you get the best experience. Learn MoreOk, Got it

theAsianparent heart icon
We’d like to send you notifications for the latest news and updates on baby care and health.