New Dad Complains His 'Wife Does Nothing But Pump', Seeks Help and Advice
"I feel like I am the only one actually handling the baby and I am exhausted."
No mum wishes to be attached to a breast pump 24/7 when she could be cosying up with her little one and spending time together.
But for some, if not many mums who experience problems with breastfeeding, the reality is such.
A new dad took to online forum Reddit on Tuesday (22 Sep), to share his predicament and complained that his wife was spending too much time pumping breastmilk for their 5-week old daughter.
While the new dad says that he “couldn’t be [happier]” that their daughter “is healthy and gaining weight,” caring for her has taken a toll on his well-being.
“I feel like I am the only one actually handling the baby and I am exhausted,” the dad wrote.
According to him, his wife is either busy with pumping breastmilk, filling the bottles, or cleaning the pump parts, leaving him to care for the baby.
Even when cooking, the dad is not spared from dad duties, saying he has to “wear the baby”.
“I am watching the baby 24/7 and she rarely does any of the actual parenting,” he says. He also claims that he changes 90 per cent of the baby’s diapers and is “ALWAYS the one to comfort the baby and put her down.”
The dad also claims that as much as he tries to accommodate to his wife who is stressed about returning to work as a working mum, he too is stretched thin.
According to the dad’s post, he sleeps in a separate room with the baby so that his wife can get long blocks of sleep at night without being disrupted.
“I am a writer and have had no time or desire to write because of how exhausted I am,” he says.
What Netizens Say
Reacting to the new dad’s predicament, many well-meaning netizens have stepped up to express their concerns and offer some advice to the troubled dad.
Reddit user @preschoolteach, mum of a 7-month-old, highlighted the possibility of the dad’s wife having postpartum depression or postpartum anxiety as she too has experienced difficulties with breastfeeding.
The dad replied to the thread commenting that his wife had been stressed also because she was adamant on exclusively breastfeeding their infant.
While encouraging breastfeeding, many parents noted the importance of mental health and offered tips for the worn-out dad and his wife.
But perhaps, one of the much-needed things the new dad and his wife needs right now is sleep, which user @sheneedsahobby advised: