Before you are pregnant, you hear about that dewy pregnancy glow, the lush hair, the extra curves – and you can’t wait to experience it all.
So now you are pregnant.
Perhaps the only truth among the miraculous changes listed above is the lush hair – and we’re not talking only about the type that grows on your head.
Hair sprouts from every surface of your body, the mythical glow is exactly that – a myth, and the curves… no one told you that your breasts would expand by two sizes every month!
The only way to survive is through the love that you feel for your little one growing rapidly in you, and of course, with some humour.
We LOVE these drawings by Crystal Ro for Buzzfeed and just had to share these, along with super-gross pregnancy changes that you can certainly relate to!
What’s that slime? Are those breasts mine? What’s that line??
Disgusting pregnancy changes
1. Acne appears everywhere: on your face, on your back, even on your boobs!
2. Veins appear everywhere too. It’s like your body has now turned into a detailed map. Again, your boobs are not spared.
3. You leak fluid at all times. When you sneeze or cough, you pee (and when you are in labour you poo).
4. Hair grows at an alarming rate all over your body.
Why is my stomach not round? Cannot. Shave. Anymore. Igiveup!
5. Your breasts expand scarily in size. This may or may not happen at the same speed with each of them, meaning you will possibly end up with one large breast and one extra-large one.
6. The mucous plug, which will pop out of your lady-parts soon enough, is oh so gross.
7. Your belly will develop a horizontal line that stretched from underboob to your crotch.
8. You become gassy. Very VERY gassy.
So wet, and not in a sexy way…
9. Your skin stretches so much that lines appear everywhere. On your belly, on your breasts, even on the tops of your arms (wear them with pride, mama tigers!).
10. Vaginal discharge increases at an alarming rate. Your thighs too.
11. Eventually, your tummy will grow so big that you cannot see your lady-parts to know if a trim, wax or shave is due. So you give up. Legs too (hello, rainforest).
And you know what? You’d happily experience all these changes a million times over just to see and hold that sweet little darling, creator of pregnancy woes, safe and sound in your arms!