When it comes right down to it, the motherhood experience is different for everyone. You can, however, categorise moms of the world into three types:
1. The Hyper Mom – Also known as the Helicopter Mom. She is overprotective, over-involved, and constantly hovering over her child to make sure everything goes 100% smoothly.
2. The Hot Mess Mom – She’s lucky if she manages to get her kids up in time before she drives them recklessly to school…in her inside out shirt. (To be fair, this is usually because she is running on four hours of sleep because she also works long hours.
3. The Chill Mom – The mom that never seems to get frazzled in her motherhood, handles life in stride, and helps her kid grow confident and happy.
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Have you wondered what’s the secret of The Chill Mom? Since I owned a blog and a business called The Chill Mom, I believe I have some say in this. It’s rather simple. When it comes down to it, I’m just like any other moms who want to keep their children happy, healthy, safe, and eventually productive members of society.
Now, let’s take a look at the 7 things chill moms DON’T Do, shall we?
1. Compare her motherhood
She’s confident and doesn’t feel the need to compete with other moms in the motherhood game. It’s easy to get sucked into comparing yourself with others, especially when lives are all on display over social media these days. But she doesn’t go there. She knows that she’s doing her best and assumes that everyone else is doing the same.
2. Compare her kids
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She’s not only confident in herself, she’s confident in her children. Her utmost concern is that her child is happy and healthy. She doesn’t have time to worry if her child sleeps too much, drinks too little milk, starts talking too late compared to Timmy, Amaya, or Deandre. She understands that each child’s development milestone is unique.
3. Try to please everyone
The old saying is that you can’t please all of the people all of the time. The Chill Mom embraces it. Trying to please your mother, MIL and that nosy next-door neighbour who thinks your kid should be potty trained by now can get exhausting. The Chill Mom does right by herself and her family and doesn’t give a damn what others think.
4. Follow the parenting book to the T
She looks at the Parenting Book as more of a guideline. She is interested in advice or eager to educate herself on methods, but ultimately, she is going to follow her intuition. No books know her children like she does.
5. Blame herself
No time for the blame game, honey, especially when you’re the subject. She has gotten over the agony of Mommy Guilt, which also means she can’t be Mommy-shamed. She’s got her own thing going, and it’s good. She doesn’t pretend to always be right, and she acknowledges when she isn’t. She learns the lesson and moves on.
6. Say “Yes” to everything and everyone
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She knows that the word “No” is a perfectly good answer in many situations. She has no problem saying “No” when the time is right. Chill moms know that their productive time and energy is not infinite. They guard their time and energy closely.
7. Play by the rules
While she recognizes that rules are useful guidelines and principles to direct her, they are by no means the end all be all for parenting. She set her own rules and refused to let motherhood dampen her dreams and style.
She understands that principles and other guiding rules for life should only be followed as long as they are working for HER. If progress has become hampered or impossible to apply the principles to her unique situation, she finds something that better suits her.
How do you become The Chill Mom? Forgive yourself more and try to please everyone else less. You have one obligation in this world, and it is to help raise your child into a healthy, happy, and well adjusted human being. And to do that? You really just need to chill out a bit.
If you are feeling overwhelmed and extremely stressed out, download my 7 Mistakes Moms Make That Prevent Them From a Happy Motherhood Report here.