This autistic girl’s birthday party had no guests… almost!

This autistic girl’s birthday party had no guests… almost!

It was a heartbreaking moment of despair for the autistic child’s mum who had no idea what to do! Then something amazing happened!

When Candy Butcher organised a birthday party for her autistic 9-year-old, little did she imagine that they will have NO guests whatsoever! Since her daughter, Rhianna, had no friends of her own, Candy had invited her friends and their children over for the birthday.

However, according to this report, most of the guests who were invited refused to turn up. Crestfallen, Candy didn’t have the heart to break this news to her child and was in tears. With no one to turn to, she opened her heart out on a Facebook group of which she was a member. Soon enough there were people writing to her saying that they will be more than eager to attend the birthday party. And these were absolute strangers!

Sometimes kindness comes from the most unexpected of sources. Whoever would have thought that a random post on social media would have this response. However, not only did people write to Candy, but they had a rocking birthday party as well.


No doubt, those moments, when the guests decided to cancel attending the party, were nothing but agonising for the mother who had painstakingly planned it. However, what I can’t get over is how some people just conveniently ignore the basic etiquettes of attending (or not) a party. Is it just me who feels that there needs to be a list of basic etiquettes to be followed for a birthday party? Here’s my list:

  • Avoid writing ‘no siblings’ on the invitation. Some people may not look at it as a part of the logistics. They may get offended. In case a parent checks with you, you could politely say that the party is meant only for her classmates. But never mention it outright on the invitation. Of course, it always makes sense to plan the party assuming 4-5 extra kids.
  • Don’t ‘ASK’ for a particular gift. Sharing an ‘I want’ list with the invite will just make you look like a greedy host. Let the guests decide what they feel is apt for your child. If you like it, well and good. If you don’t, you could always donate it.
  • Expect messes and meltdowns. If it is a child's birthday party, expect it to be a messy affair with an occasional meltdown. NEVER freak out! Stay calm and try to fix the situation instead of getting flustered and adding to the chaos.
  • Don't open gifts. Again, it may make you look plain greedy, impatient and rude if you open up all the gifts right there in front of the guests. Also, certain gifts may be more valuable than others. This will make the guests feel uncomfortable. It’s a matter of time before you are on your own with the family for you to unwrap al the goodies.
  • Say goodbye to each guest. By the end of the party you will be exhausted, no doubt. But have the courtesy to say goodbye to each guest as he leaves. Make them feel appreciated for taking out the time and making your party a success.
  • Send Thank You notes. Make a list of who gave what and ensure that you send a thank you note to for the gifts to each guest. You could also just include a Thank You note in the return-gift's bag that you hand over to the guest at the end of the party.

These are a list of basic birthday party etiquette you could follow if hosting a birthday party. Happy partying!

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[Images courtesy: Pixabay]

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Written by

Divya Nair

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