What to do when your child hates school - Tips for Singapore parents

What to do when your child hates school - Tips for Singapore parents

Read on to find out what you can do when your child hates school.

School refusal

What should you do when your child hates school? Read on to find out.

Every parent probably dreads the day when his or her child says he hates school. When your child hates school, you sometimes feel like there’s nothing you can do.

The truth is though, there are ways you can help your child approach each school day with enthusiasm — or at the very least, with enough ‘happy thoughts’ to do their best at school. Here are some suggestions.

Learn with your child


When your child hates school, one of the ways you can help him is to learn with him, or help him learn by setting an example for him to follow.

Young children have an intense desire to please their parents and emulate their behavior. It’s a classic case of ‘monkey see… monkey do’ — so let them see you ‘do’!

Let them see you reading, learning a new hobby, discussing the news with your spouse (and with them in age-appropriate ways) and listening with interest to the events of their day. The two of you can read together, experience museums, exhibits and other cultural events, as well.

Be involved

Being involved with your child’s education means you will participate in parent organizations in your child’s school and be pro-active in communicating with your child’s teacher(s) as regards your child’s learning style, progress, social behavior and any problems or issues that may arise.

Build on your existing family rules as your child grows up, especially when she starts going to school.

Take an interest in your child’s progress and activities at school and elsewhere.

Being involved also means you will check your child’s homework to make sure they are grasping concepts properly, help them prepare for quizzes/tests by asking them questions, and helping to make sure they know the subject matter discussed in school.

As your children get older, you may or may not need to brush up on your understanding of some subjects so you can be of assistance or, at the very least, understand what your children are talking about.

Be firm but encouraging

What to do when your child hates school - Tips for Singapore parents

Always encourage your child to do her best at school and elsewhere. It’s also best to know what your child’s learning style is.

Every child learns by one or a combination of learning styles. By knowing what your child’s learning style is, you will be able to encourage her educational endeavors by providing an atmosphere conducive to their personality.

As a parent, it is also your job to not allow your child to use their dislike for a subject or subjects as an excuse for not learning, or not being able to understand certain concepts. We understand what we choose to understand, so make it a point to encourage your child to choose to do so.

Find out the real reason why your child hates school

If you are a parent reading this thinking, ‘I’ve done all of that’ but your child hates school still, try to get to the root of the problem — because, most likely, there is a problem at school that is causing his animosity.

Your child may be suffering at the hands (or mouth) of a bully. His dislike or hatred of school may be the result of how they are being treated by others.

Your child may also be in a classroom where he/she and the teacher are at odds. Maybe their personalities are like oil and water, or the teacher’s teaching style is so off from your child’s learning style that they just can’t click.


One of the reasons your child hates school may be her teacher, so do a thorough investigation.

As a result, your child is inattentive, bored, frustrated and possibly even disruptive.

Your child may have a learning disability. Hearing and vision problems, anxiety, ADHD, dyslexia and the inability to socialize can put major roadblocks in your child’s way.

Any of these conditions not only hinders a child’s ability to learn but because he isn’t keeping up with his peers, he may feel inadequate, dumb and useless. Make sure your child’s hearing, vision and speech patterns are on target to help make sure his ‘school hate’ isn’t caused by something medical that can be easily taken care of.

Remember, school should be enjoyable rather than tolerable. Going to school should help build your child’s confidence in her abilities, not tear them apart.

This is why it is vital that you approach each school day with enthusiasm and comforting reassurance. Help your child by letting him know how wonderfully special, unique and amazing he is so that he will eventually be able to go to school without any problems.

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Written by

Darla Noble

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