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Overcoming single fatherhood: Wayne Toh

29 Aug, 2013
Overcoming single fatherhood: Wayne Toh

When Wayne Toh's wife suddenly left him in 2010, he was faced with 2 huge challenges. He had to handle his 4 grief stricken children and his newly launched business. Find out how he did it!

Does the name Wayne Toh ring a bell to you? Chances are that it doesn’t. Wayne Toh may not be a dashing actor or a powerhouse singer. But we feel that this seemingly ordinary man very much deserves a chance to shine in the media spotlight. Why? Simply because Wayne Toh is an extraordinary father and a true inspiration to us all.

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Wayne Toh

Wayne Toh had to take care of his 4 children on his own when his wife left him.

When his whole world crashed down

3 years ago, Wayne Toh’s life took a drastic turn when his 33-year old wife left him in search of ‘freedom’. Apart from the emotional devastation he suffered, he also had to handle his newly launched photography business. Any entrepreneur can testify that starting a new business is an arduous task. And it seemed like Wayne’s business of giving photography lessons to primary school students was a doomed venture. But managing a new business was not the only problem.

Wayne Toh

Wayne Toh’s children were fortunate to have him take care of them when their mother left.

As any parent would know, handling one child can already be quite a handful. Taking care of 4 children who had just been abandoned by their mother? That sounds like a downright nightmare. But luckily for Wayne’s 4 children: 13-year old Seth, 11-year old Ethel, 9-year old Tertius and 7-year old Elliot, they had an extraordinary father.

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Find out how Wayne Toh and his children coped with the situation on the next page.

Dark Days

Of course, one does not simply rise up immediately to such a daunting challenge. Wayne had his dark moments.  Wayne recalled, “When standing near the window, I’d feel like jumping down. Or when the kids were sleeping, I’d feel like turning on the gas.” He also confessed to taking out his frustration and anger on his children and sometimes cried his heart out alone in his room. As Wayne states in a video posted on the yahoo news website, “I can’t understand how a mother can just leave her children.”

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Wayne wasn’t the only one feeling depressed. His children too were confused at how their mother had the heart to walk out of their lives. “I ran away from home twice… I was unstable,” said Seth, who is currently a secondary one student at the School of the Arts (SOTA). 11-year old Ethel too was affected badly by the crisis. Wayne reported that his daughter would wake up in the middle of the night crying for her absent mother.

Wayne Toh

It is tough for a single father to juggle work, being there for his kids, and also handle the chores.

Getting back on his feet

Despite the challenges faced at home and at work, Wayne managed to get back on his feet. It took 2 years for Wayne to fully recover from the difficult ordeal but for the sake of his children, he had no choice. He told his children “Even though mother walked out, Daddy can still give the kind of attention you need.” Wayne added, “I’m a hands-on daddy. I bathe them, I put them to sleep everyday and I also do the house chores.”

It is now 2013, and 3 years have passed since Wayne divorced his wife. Wayne has bravely overcome his ordeal and is now a much stronger man and a true inspiration to us all.

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 Watch the video where Wayne shares about his experience:

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Written by

Sean Foo

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