It’s easy to judge and criticise a mother, especially when her child is misbehaving in public. Even mothers who have children can’t stop themselves from throwing a disapproving look at her as her frustrated toddler rolls around the floor.
But, we’re pretty sure this is not how she envisioned her day to play out, too.
It is frustrating and irritating for an observer who’s simply trying to enjoy his coffee in peace.
But imagine the mother who has to deal with a stubborn toddler. Needless to say, cut her some slack.
The best way to handle the situation as an “observer” is to let them be, or if you can’t handle the wailing, take a short walk away from the scene.
On the other hand, a bad way to handle the situation is by further exasperating the mother with your disapproving looks and groaning. Trying to swoop in to “save the day” with your own parental tips and guidance is even worse. (So not cool.)
Your advice may be given with the best of intentions, but we assure you that it will heed little or no good results.
Next time you see a toddler throwing a fit, here are some other things you shouldn’t do and shouldn’t say to the mum.
1. Maybe he’s hungry/ sleepy/ needs to be changed…
Yes. Really. I probably never thought of checking on those things first. But I’ll happily take note of your “theory” and put that on my list of possible things that have turned my child into an incorrigible monster. Yours goes right before “demon possession,” and after “brain-eating virus.”
2. My child never did that.
Good for you. Your child must have popped out onto the delivery table with wings and a halo.
3. Have you tried/ considered doing …
Nope. I haven’t and I won’t.
4. It’s a phase; they’ll outgrow it.
Oh boy, and I thought I could look forward to another one of these episodes at my daughter’s 18th birthday, where little Annie will be holding her breath til she turns blue. That’s what we get for not giving her the convertible she wanted.
5. You’ll get better at dealing with these things over time.
Yes. Give me a few months, and I’ll learn how to wrangle my child with cattle rope.
6. I’m sooo glad I’m done with that.
Good for you. I await the day too when I’ll reach that point of Nirvana, most probably assisted by brightly-coloured meds and painkillers.
7. Sometimes it’s better to leave him/ her at home with the babysitter.
And after this episode, I’m probably considering too locking them up in their rooms until they’re 18.
8. Groan and sigh
Sorry. I didn’t hear you over my wailing toddler. Please groan a little louder.
If you say something stupid and Mama Bear decides to pounce, you deserve it.
READ: Things not to say to a pregnant mum!
Comment below on how you handle situations like these.
