How to say NO to your kid

Saying "no" to kids can often be a tricky business as you need to make them understand the importance of this word, albeit without losing your temper. Here's a guide that can help you teach your kids the importance of saying "No".

How to say NO to your kid

A vital concept that you need to make your child understand from a very young age is the concept of "No". It is a part of the healthy discipline that you need to inculcate so he can understand his limits.

Learn to say no rule #1 - When to say no

Your children will constantly test you to search for their own limits and they will try to push those limits further and farther. But you have to implement discipline and rules in a consistent yet loving manner. You also have to define the consequences for rebellious behavior. When you are consistent in your approach, your children will understand how to behave, what’s acceptable and what’s not.

Learn to say no rule #2- Act like an adult

You have to be the parent that you are, always remembering that your goal is ensuring your child’s safety, comfort and best interests. You have to stop rebellious behavior before it becomes a nuisance.

Your child may love fiddling with gadgets and while it looks cute the first time, you will soon realize that meddling with these gadgets can only cause harm to your own child as well as to the appliances. Cue to step in and stop the undesirable behaviour.

You need to approach the situation seriously. Your child may not be old enough to understand the language but he will definitely recognize the severity of the tone and back off. Of course, being the inquisitive child that he is, he will probably come back to it even after you say no. You have to be consistent, not give in and always respond in the same way.

Learn to say no rule #3 - How to say "No"

Say no, be careful not to scream, shout or smack. Experience tells me that such tactics are only counter-productive and induce more rebellious behaviuor in the child. Low, firm and serious tones work effectively with children.

Always consider adopting a gentler, safer approach before going in for anything dramatic and drastic. You can also try to give some reasoning for your "no".

Make the child understand why you don’t want him to do something. If the child wants to play with toilet water, make him understand by using words like "Dirty", "Yucky" etc to describe the water and make faces. Chances are that the child wouldn’t want to play with that the next time.

Learn to say no rule #4 - Fighting your own reluctance

Sometimes, our parental instincts may come in the way of being strict with our children. The softer side of you will feel bad about denying your child something but you need to remember that you are only doing it for the child’s safety, family harmony and peace.

Learn to say no rule #5 - Good behavior should be rewarded

You can encourage your child to behave well with words of appreciation, hugs and kisses. All children like to be patted and praised and if they feel that their good actions get them these praises, they would definitely want to continue that behavior.

Saying "no" to kids and making them realize why you said no are very difficult things for parents to do. However, it’s important if you want them to develop into healthy, well-behaved adults.

Written by

Roshni Mahtani

Discipline