Help! My 3-year-old has a temper

Lots of parents reach a roadblock when it comes to their child's temper and tantrums. Here , some parents share some pretty strong advice on this issue .

temper

Tips and advice on dealing with your toddler’s temper and tantrums

An innocent toy whizzes past your face as you come running out of a room to find out what all that  racket and noise is about. And right there , is your little production throwing a mighty full-fledged tantrum enough to put the Energizer bunny to shame. There you stand wondering to yourself, should I start preparing my child for his incredibly bright future in shot-put for the Youth Olympic Games? Or is this a temper tantrum that may require some serious attention? This is an issue that was brought up by a parent, and here are some replies from some fellow parents as well.

Mum needs help: My 3-year-old son has a bad temper. What should I do?

Replies:

Shanna Ting: I believe this is part of a phase of the Terrible 3 stage. Maybe you would like to elaborate more on what type of “bad temper” and actions he displays to help us understand more before I can offer any advice.

Patricia Alvisse: Discipline him now before it’s too late. Discipline your son and you can always be proud of him. He will never give you reason to be ashamed.    Proverbs 29:17 . Correction and discipline are good for children. If a child has his own way, he will make his mother ashamed of him. Proverbs 29: 15

Nalini Sivaperumal: Just be a role model, be consistent and firm…children don’t have a bad temper, they are following behavior which may have been acceptable when they were younger but is now seen as “not cute”. Everyone around the child has to follow the same rules for being firm with the child.

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May Siew: A child is the reflection of the parent.

Shanna Ting : This i do not agree, there are many horrible parents out there, but their kid turns out totally different from them.
Sometimes bad/short temper may mean the child doesn’t know how to control his emotions well yet. 3 is still a very tender age…. what TS should do is to talk and ask the child what he wants or what is wrong whenever he throws a temper. Some kids do not know how to channel their emotions properly whenever they feel upset over something.
Different methods to be used on different kids.
1) Naughty corner/time out session.
2) Use of the cane.
3) Ignoring.

Regardless of which method you use, after both (you and the child) cooled down, TALK and explain.
Explain why he shouldn’t have done it and then teach him what or how he should do/react. This way, the child understands and each time he does it correctly, (instead of throwing a tantrum, he tells u what he does not like) praise n reward him.

Chuyan Kwek: My son too prefer to shout and hit rather than talk/negotiate/ask nicely. Hope to get some advice on how to calm him down so that can talk to him. Timeout make him even more angry as he view it as a punishment.

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Andy Ang: I believe in sensory memory…after a few warning..a big fat slap on the butt…after crying I will ask him why he is punished and whether he wants to do it again..

Chitra Nair: I find ‘time-outs’ very effective…. I also refuse to speak to him unless he calms down…do it a few times n then they take u seriously…I have not had to hit him yet (he is 4 1/2 now)…I keep reminding myself to be calm and not react…. I just keep looking at him without speaking and tell him very softly, if he wants me to listen to him, he has to calm down n speak “nicely”. it was tough initially, but now he knows thats the only way to get his point across. He also knows its not a guarantee for getting his way!

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