Parents of special needs children are usually unsung heroes
Many parents would condemn Jenny Young for such a heartless statement—after all every child is a gift from the heavens, no matter what the challenge. Let’s take a peek into the mind of Jenny to see how she has to deal with pain and frustration when handling her mentally challenged son Ryan, who is now 10.
Move him out!
Jenny has three other children who were also a challenge as they were all pumped up with too much energy; she suspects they all had ADHD. Jenny Young, 53, has been married and divorced three times. In her second marriage to a lorry driver she had three kids: Douglas 24, Greg 23, and Josephine 19.
Her youngest son Ryan, has severe learning disabilities and ADHD. Ryan may be 10 but he has the mental age of a two-year-old. In fact mummy Jenny wants Ryan to move of her three-bedroom terrace home in Hertfordshire to a residential care.
She said: “I don’t want to be doing this when I’m 80 and he’s 40. You see people like that and they just look exhausted.”
Watch the video here:
No rewards for being a good mother
Caring for a normal child is a tough job but caring for a special needs child can zap everything from you. There is nothing easy about parenthood; it’s sheer love, devotion and selflessness. But it seems that Jenny needs recognition and appreciation for her hard work. Jenny revealed that her son gets violent with her daily—scratching, punching and tugging her hair. He can’t event go to the toilet like a regular child.
She said: “Where is my diploma, where is my pay rise, where is my promotion? Just think what I could have achieved if I’d spent ten years in a career.”
In an interview conducted by Daily Mail, she was asked if she would retract her very hurtful statement where she said if her son were a dog, she would put him down. She responded: “‘No, I stand by what I said. I’m glad it’s out there now. It needed saying, and for every comment castigating me, I’ve had five which are supportive.’
Hard work and no play
No excuses for her but perhaps she has been stretched too thin for the past decade that she is spewing such heartless comments but she clearly loves her son and her son is utterly dependant on her. She also has no help from a spouse.
ADHD: nature or nurture?
Some studies suggest that perhaps ADHD is not biological; it could be a child’s surroundings or upbringing that could be a factor. Read the article below about why France has a lower rate of kids with ADHD compared to America—it’s all about parenting.
Heroes suffering in silence
The job of a mother is one for life and it is accepted and embraced. Many mothers have special needs children but graciously carry out their loving motherly duties without uttering any complaint. Perhaps they feel that it’s not right to grumble—as the child may have it worse.
Here’s to all the unsung heroes—devoted and selfless mothers and fathers who continue to beat the odds and climb that hill, knowing that it will be a struggle for life.
Forgotten families: Families and their struggles dealing with special needs children
