New Dad's Diaries: A Father's Letter to His Newborn Son
This new father welcomes his newborn and makes a few promises. But, he also has a few expectations from his son.
Words cannot describe the emotions I felt when I first held you. There you were, tiny and helpless, eased out of your mother to be put to her bosom. You tried to suckle, but you were too tired and exhausted. Your mother was crying, everybody was relieved and I was humbled. The joy of knowing about the pregnancy followed by the wait, your kicks and hiccups, the nine months of care, all flashed in front of my eyes.
So here is a letter for you. I want to tell you how I feel, now that you have made me a dad. I wish you would read this in a few years and understand it fully in a few more. This may sound a little boring but bear with me just for a while.
When we decided to bring a life to this world, we knew that we had a responsibility: one towards you and the other towards the society. It is our obligation to give you everything you need to be ready to face the world, but it is also a tremendous responsibility to give the world a better you. And so, here are a few things I want you to know.
You are special, but don’t consider yourself entitled
You are my most precious little bundle of joy. When I look into your eyes, I see myself looking into my own soul. I see the joy on your face, and all my troubles vanish. Yes, you are special.
Your mother and I are exhausted. Parenting is not easy. It is difficult to function normally let alone work, but we try our best. But all that does not matter when we hold you. In fact, we fight the most over who would be holding you! Yes, you are special.
You have changed our weekends. All our schedules revolve around you. But all that does not matter, because, you are special.
You are special to us. That does not mean you are entitled. It is a hard truth, but the sooner you understand it, the better it is for all of us! I promise I would not think twice about buying something you need. But when it comes to wants, you would have to hear a ‘no’. And that is how I want to raise you. I cannot unleash a spoiled brat into the society. When you grow up, you would understand how important it is to hear a no early on in life. Don’t take anything, including an inheritance for granted.
Be what you want, but be a humble person
I don’t know everything about parenting. What I do know is, I am not going to stop you from exploring. I I see it in your eyes that you are a curious fellow. I promise you I will never kill it. Ask me as many questions as you want. I will try my best to answer them all. If I cannot, I will find someone who will. I want you to make your career choices based on your own experiences. I sense greatness in you.
In the process, don’t forget your roots. You come from a family of humble people. It is through a lot of experience that your mother and I have come to the conclusion that empathy is far more important than fancy degrees. When you grow up, the experiences you have may start to numb you. Resist this suppression as much as you can. Be sensitive to the need of others. Succeed, but not at the cost of others. There is no pride in stepping over someone to succeed.
Remember, work hard towards making the pie bigger. That way, everyone can get a bigger slice!
At the same time, be blind to a few things…
Till now, I have been asking you to be a sensitive person. I will be a proud parent if you turn out to be a caring person on whom, people usually depend on. But I will be even more proud if you can be blind towards a few things.
I want you to be blind towards races. I don’t want your response to change when you see the person. I have tried all my life to build a set of principles. The foundation of my principles is to respond according to the ‘need’ and not the ‘needy’. I will be very proud if you lose the sense of differentiation between people and treat them as equals. There is no pride in knowing a rich man and no shame in befriending poor.
“In the times of increasing polarity, I want you to be a beacon of hope for those who know you.”
Son, there are many more things I want to say, and I will, a bit later. I know that you did not ask us to bring you to this world. It was our own selfish desire to trap a wandering soul in this mortal world. We understand our obligation. Today, I promise you all my time and attention that you may ever need.
Just be a good human being when you grow up.
Will always love you,