Without realising it, most Singaporeans might already be well-acquainted with the effervescent Maddy Barber. Just think of your morning commute to school or the office and chances are, you’d have come across her voice on the radio.
The 47-year-old is married to Wez Barber, and they have Alicia, 15, and 25-year-old Elizabeth from Maddy’s previous marriage.
Maddy said the two young women have come to learn that there is strength in saying the word ‘no’.
“I think ‘no’ is a very important word, especially for girls to learn. And it goes beyond sexual advances, you know.”
She provided the workplace environment as an example of where one can learn how and when to say it.
Image source: Instagram / maddybarber
“If you’re able to tell your colleagues, ‘Oh I’m sorry, I’m busy. I can’t do this. Can you get someone else to do it for you?’, you’re happier, right? It’s a sense of freedom.
“You have to think for yourself rather than worrying about what others would say and always feeling obliged.”
Saying ‘no’ out loud could have a stigmatising effect in our traditional society.
Maddy, however, believes her daughters should not be afraid of doing it. There is a caveat, though.
“So I tell them ‘no’ a lot. But we have a running joke at home, ‘You must learn how to say no, except to me!'” she quipped.
The Importance Of Teaching Kids About ‘No’
Image source: iStock
Maddy Barber may have a point. It is in fact, important for our kids to learn to say ‘No.’ Especially if someone is trying to exploit them.
Here are a few ways you can teach your little one to use the big two-lettered word:
1. Let them be confident in expressing their opinions. Once they learn how to share their thoughts and share their feelings honestly, it will help them learn more about their own likes and dislikes.
2. Clarify that saying no doesn’t necessarily mean rejection. Teach them that you can have differing opinions with someone. Also that you can have conflicting interests but still manage a cordial relationship.
3. Remind them to explain why they refuse. If they do say ‘no,’ they should not forget to provide an explanation.
4. Teach them not to give in to peer pressure. Let your children know that they should be firm with their decision and try not be easily swayed, especially in an uncomfortable situation.
5. Be a good role model. Demonstrate how you would refuse things and the right time to say ‘no.’
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