Recently, a fellow mum shared a post asking for basic product advice in an online mother’s group.
The mother had been routinely removing her 11-year-old daughter’s pubic hair with cream but found it was getting quite expensive – so she asked if any other mums could suggest a more affordable option.
But instead, she was slammed for going anywhere near her daughter’s nether regions. How did THAT happen?
I am mad on this poor mother’s behalf. I wanted to reach out and tell her she did a great favour for her child. It’s not like she asked if she should or shouldn’t take to her daughter’s puberty growth spurt. So why was that even a point of discussion?
More than that, why was it suggested that her daughter cover her bikini line with shorts so as not to show her hair in the first place?
The fact is, we all make parenting choices that affect our children but we won’t know the true effects of our actions until much later on in life – so don’t judge.
My own kids suffered a hairy dilemma
My two girls were born into Irish and European heritage. This was always going to be a gorgeous mix with red highlights in the summer, naturally darkened hair in the winter and … thick body hair!
Hang on, that took a turn for the worst – but it’s the truth.
My kids were born with that fine covering of lanugo hair that is endearing at birth. They were all fluffy and just perfect.
Over time, it fell out and faded but being naturally hairy beings, they soon started to take after both of their parents with thick hair growing all over. Yup, it’s our fault.
One was as fair as the Irish, the other not so fortunate. She developed the darker pigments of the European side.
As time went on, their hair started bothering them. The youngest was first to bring it up at 8, asking for her monobrow to be plucked.
I had no idea that she even knew what a monobrow was let alone plucking!
When she explained the taunting she was getting, I helped her out a little, mostly to avoid her walking the same line as I did, taking to my mum’s tweezers and having 90’s brows forever!
The bridge of her nose and the smile on her face walking into school the next day was priceless.
Puberty started (a little) early
Yep, sad fact. By the time the eldest was 11, she had a full monobrow, seriously fluffy underarms and, you guessed it, a pubic hair growth spurt that was uneven and quite frankly uncomfortable.
The adjusting was driving ME mental, I couldn’t imagine what it was doing to her!
I asked if she was OK, thinking that she may have had a rash – or worse. But she took me into the bathroom, pulled down her undies and pointed. With a huff, she stated, “Look!”.
Now, I’ve not seen that area for a little while so my shock must have shown. It was there, it was thick and honestly, uncomfortably uneven. The poor kid had been dealing with a tuft of hair, so patchy and wiry it would have made me itch!
It was all too quick
I know we always think that our kids grow up overnight but I swear, that was like the blink of an eye! So, I did the only thing I knew to do. I grabbed the lady-clippers, gave a quick tutorial, then we clipped.
Not once did it cross my mind that she was ‘only’ 11, nor did I think, ‘well, no-ones going to see it, so it doesn’t matter’. My only thought was that she was uncomfy – and it was all brand new and pretty awkward to even bring it up in the first place.
After a quick shower, she came to me fully-clothed again and thanked me.
How can that be bad?
Waxing for aesthetics or being so truly hung up on your looks that you’re projecting an ‘older beyond their years’ approach to our children is one thing.
But simply removing uncomfortable new growth is a whole different matter. Puberty is a tough time for any kid and if I can make it that little more comfortable with a shaver and smile – I will.
And to ‘that mum’. GO YOU! You did what you thought was best and you asked for the best brand that wasn’t going to nip, clip or rip your child. Well done!