15 hilarious tweets that all married couples can relate to

"Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life."

Good marriages aren’t only filled with love but a great sense of humour.

And there is no shortage of people who totally just get this on Twitter. We’ve rounded up the funniest, and most on-point tweets that are sure to crack up married couples.

1.

Me: Look, I love you, But I made exactly the amount of cheese & crackers I want to eat right now.
Wife: But I only…
Me: EXACTLY the amount — keith (@tchrquotes) November 4, 2014

2.

Marriage is basically just whispering, “Are you awake? I need to show you this cat video.” — Mel Evans (@mel_evans) February 22, 2016

3.

The best thing about being married is having someone who can tell you if something is disgusting or not… — Boyd’s Backyard (@TheBoydP) February 24, 2016

4.

Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life. — ⚡️QUΞΞN ΔLΔNΔ⚡️ (@AlanaRockz) November 16, 2015

5.

Today’s my husband’s birthday, so… *flips coin to see if I should shave above the knee* — Ashley Austrew (@ashleyaustrew) January 29, 2016

6.

You pee too loud. – Marriage — KC of TX (@kcmoore51) February 12, 2016

7.

[runs to the door to greet wife]
I’m afraid there’s been a terrible accident involving all the things you asked me to do today. — David Hughes (@david8hughes) February 28, 2016

8.

Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn’t wanna share. — Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) December 30, 2015

9.

[rolls over in bed and whispers to wife]
“I ate like 75 chicken nuggets today” — Rocky Momax (@rockymomax) February 16, 2016

10.

Me: Wait, so it’s cool for you to use my phone charger but I can’t touch yours? Wife: Correct. — Rock (@TheMichaelRock) January 28, 2016

11.

It’s 3pm and my husband and I are still sitting in bed waiting for the other to get up and make coffee this morning. — Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) February 14, 2015

12.

Wife: You pick dinner. Me: Pizza. Wife: No. Me: Tacos. Wife: No. Me: Subs. Wife: No. Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT?! Wife: It’s up to you. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 22, 2016

13.

Marriage is like coffee. First it’s really hot. Then it’s just right. Then it helps you get off your ass and do things. — Josh Hara (@yoyoha) February 10, 2016

14.

Marriage Morning Ritual Year One: *kiss*. I love you!
Year Five: Have a great day! *air kiss*
Year Ten: Grunt; stumbles out the door. — Stacey Sordahl (@DrunkAtThePTA) February 25, 2016

15.

Marriage is essentially just having somebody who you can have regular conversations with while one or both of you are stark naked. — lauren robinson (@laurenjoyness) September 15, 2015

READ: 10 Funny parenting tweets

If you have any insights, questions or comments regarding the topic, please share them in our Comment box below.

Got a parenting concern? Read articles or ask away and get instant answers on our app. Download theAsianparent Community on iOS or Android now!

Written by

Bianchi Mendoza

Funnymarried couplestweet