10 Funny parenting tweets

We scoured twitterverse for some laughs and we stumbled upon tweets about parenting that made our day!

1. Because Happy Meal is a choice.

Do you like toys? Then McDonald’s is the only choice! – my 4yo trying to convince his brother where we should go for dinner — Father With Twins (@FatherWithTwins) October 3, 2014

2. Sorry, 90s babies.

My 6-year-old just now, “Mommy’s not young, she was born in the nineties!” #wrongonbothcounts #kidssaythefunniestthings — Steve Shuman (@sjshuman) September 5, 2015

3. Looks like mom needs to have “the talk” soon.

Quote of day (year?) from E: So B was in your belly when he was a baby…did you eat him? Why did you eat him? — Sara Mutchler (@SocialSara612) September 1, 2015

4. When all else fails, blame your spouse.

Parenting is 50% proudly boasting “he gets that from me!” and 50% side eyeing your spouse and grumbling “he doesn’t get that from me.” — Lurk @ Home Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) November 4, 2015

5. So cute it’s creepy.

Me: “I’m sorry I yelled.” 6yo: “I love you anyway. I’ll still love you when you’re dead.” …is that a threat? — Lea Grover (@bcmgsupermommy) November 9, 2015

6. Because you know long weekends don’t really exist.

Me: Yay! It’s a four-day weekend! [after 2 hours of my son talking to me about sports and Minecraft] Me: OH GOD WHY — Sarah (est. 1975) (@est1975blog) November 13, 2015

7. Because “going potty” requires creativity.

I just told the 3yo that all our poops are lonely in the septic tank because she insists on using a diaper instead of the toilet. ???????? — Will Goldstein (@willgoldstein) November 13, 2015

8. But you love them all equally.

Raising your 1st child: “Ooh look he found his hand! He smiled! He breathes so cute!” Raising your 3rd child: “Where’d you put the baby?” — Will Goldstein (@willgoldstein) November 5, 2015

9. This overachiever is adorable.

6: Dad I got perfect on my math quiz Me: Great! How many did you get right? 6: 40 out of 30 M: 6: M: And you say this was a *math* quiz? — Dare To Meh! (@TheAlexNevil) November 3, 2015

10. This kid calls the shots.

Today my 3yo son has decided it’s #NoClothesDay. #ParentingWoes — Anamika Thokal (@anamika_thokal) October 1, 2015

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Funny Parenting Tweets