Today, the places where teens gather have moved online. Friendships unfold across Discord servers and Twitch chats. Some friends live a few MRT stops away, others live halfway around the world. Their jokes live in memes, and their private conversations sit in online forums or platforms parents have never heard of.
The connections remain real, but the risks have multiplied. Now, strangers are just one chat bubble away on your child’s phone. Platforms like Instagram, Twitch, and Telegram let anyone send a private message. While some can look friendly, they can turn out to be bait for harmful schemes.
A recent survey by Singapore’s Ministry of Communications and Information showed that while one in three Singaporean youths had played online games with strangers, only three in ten parents knew who their child was gaming with.
The new “stranger danger”
During my years investigating cybercrime, I learned that online strangers rarely look like villains at first. These strangers talk like fellow gamers, moderators, or even admired figures like influencers. They may say something harmless like:
- “Want to join our game tonight? Share with me your details here.”
- “You’ve won a free in-game skin by following me! Claim it here.”
- “Would you like to join my live stream? Just help donate here for me to rent the equipment.”
One click later, and your child’s data, photos, or logins could be compromised.
From Arcades to Cyberspace: Where Teens Hang Out Has Changed. Here’s How Parents Can Keep Them Safe
What truly drives these schemes is emotion rather than technical complexity. Criminals study behavior. They know how to create panic: “Act now or lose everything.” They build shame and guilt. “Don’t tell anyone, they’ll think you’re a loser”. They use flattery. “You’re special, we picked you.”
Some bad actors push further. They coax teens into sharing private photos by positioning them as a joke or a dare. Criminals are now using AI-powered deepfake tools to humiliate or threaten teenagers, manipulating their images to blackmail them. Most of this starts with a message that seems friendly.
Young victims rarely reach out to their parents out of fear, especially when bad actors threaten to release humiliating information or photos — sometimes even involving their family or close friends. Cyberbullying, grooming, and sextortion often show up as small but noticeable changes in behavior. You may see your child:
- Becoming unusually secretive when talking about their friends
- Obsessively checking or completely avoiding their phones
- Showing heightened anxiety when a notification comes in
- Spending an excessive amount of time with their “online friend”
- Asking for increased monthly allowances without a clear explanation
None of these signs confirm danger, but they are good reasons to ask gentle questions.
Building safer habits without fear
From Arcades to Cyberspace: Where Teens Hang Out Has Changed. Here’s How Parents Can Keep Them Safe
Creating an “open digital culture” at home is key to helping teens build strong cyber hygiene without fear. Here’s how parents can do so:
- Talk to your children about their online habits with curiosity, instead of tightening control. Rather than checking every message, ask them to show you what they enjoy. What’s their favorite Discord server? How does that Roblox group work? The goal is to understand their world so you can discuss risks before they become real.
- Trust your gut. Parents usually sense when something’s off long before it becomes a crisis. If your child seems different, don’t ignore it.
- If something goes wrong, don’t be quick to judge or scold. Use the moment to teach. Be open about your own online habits too and share when you make mistakes, along with what you learnt. Teens appreciate honesty more than lectures.
- If a scam or grooming attempt has already happened, save the evidence as proof. Keeping screenshots and chat logs, even if they’re upsetting, can go a long way to helping platforms or authorities act quickly.
- Keep an eye on trusted local resources and make it a point to discuss them with your children. Singapore’s IMDA, CSA, and even school advisories often publish updates on scams and new online tricks. Staying aware of what criminals are trying this month makes it much easier to spot danger together.
Navigating the digital world together
I think about how we used to hang out at arcades or skate parks without anyone worrying too much, as long as we were safe. Our kids’ hangouts look nothing like that now – most of it happens over the internet. Even so, the key responsibility for parents doesn’t change. And that’s to provide them with a safe place with the freedom to explore and grow.
It starts with us deciding to be more engaged, curious, and knowledgeable as parents. Rather than setting parameters, we need to see the process as a journey to take with their kids. One where we explore their online environments together, learning alongside them, and being there to guide them through it.
About the Author
Jake Moore is the Global Cybersecurity Advisor at ESET, Europe’s leading cybersecurity company. A former police officer with 14 years of experience investigating cybercrime, he regularly shares expert insights on online safety, cybersecurity, and emerging digital threats with media outlets including the BBC, ITV, The Independent, and The Times.
