Mothers say the darnest things!

Mothers say the darnest things when cheesed off with their kids!

Sometimes, mothers say the silliest things when cheesed off with their kids!

Kids are known to say the ‘darnedest things’ but moms aren’t too far behind. In fact, after you read this you might decide mums take the lead.

RELATED: When your kids say things they shouldn’t 

All in a day’s work

If you’re a mum, you know life gets crazy and in all that craziness, we say things that seem completely reasonable in the moment. Reasonable–maybe? Funny–definitely! Here are a few examples: 

• Get your finger out of your sister’s nose and go comb your hair.
• You need to drink your milk out of your cup and leave Maggie’s milk for her puppies.
• There is no ‘tractor’ button on the microwave.
• No, thank you. I can wipe my bottom myself.
• If you cut your brother’s hair again you’ll go bald.
• Don’t play with that boy–he steals trains.
• Do not pee on your brother–he just had a bath (as if it wouldn’t matter if he hadn’t had a bath)

Don’t judge me

When you are in public with your kids, there are likely going to be times when what you say could easily be misconstrued. But hey, who are they to judge? They don’t know the whole story.

• Do not poop in the ball pit–again.
• It’s not nice to touch your penis and then touch your food.
• The dog isn’t blind–the man is.
• If you don’t come with me right now, they are going to put a price sticker on you and sell you.
• If you throw that rock at me I’ll throw it back–and I have better aim.
• Why did you mix sand in your sister’s juice and tell her it was a smoothie?
• You don’t have enough money to buy a new mum but I’ll give you some if that’s what you really want to do.
• Did you drink that bottle of bubbles? Oh, well, you’ll have the cleanest butt in town.

Don’t worry!

For all you new and future moms, don’t worry. You’ll get here eventually. Oh, we more seasoned moms were just like you once upon a time. We couldn’t imagine saying the words ‘penis’ and ‘poop’ to our kids and we certainly didn’t think we’d ever have to warn them against playing with a train thief. But it happens because life with kids is crazy and wonderful–and we wouldn’t have it any other way. Really!