Every parent has the goal of raising kids that are confident in themselves. Kids with greater self-esteem have the courage and bravery to embrace challenge and reach their goals in life. That’s why it’s imperative that parents do all they can to ensure that their kids are being raised with a sufficient amount of confidence and self-esteem.
Dr. Lesly Devereaux, motivational speaker, author, and life coach has dedicated her professional career to helping people find their confidence. She’s a firm believer in the idea of instilling confidence in children and she’s not alone. S. Renee Smith, a self-esteem/branding expert, life coach and author, agrees with Devereaux’s assertions. The two have offered countless pieces of advice which parents can use to help raise more confident children.
Here’s a look at 7 tips these experts suggest will help you raise more confident children:
1. Set a good example
Young children are very impressionable, and parents would be wise to take advantage of their impressionable nature while they’re still growing. In a 2015 study conducted by the University of Washington, researchers concluded that children develop self-esteem as early as age 5.
Knowing this, parents should make use of these formative years and lead by example. Parents should always display a confident attitude in order to help mould a more confident child. “When a child sees that a parent is confident, then they’re going to emulate that behaviour,” says Dr. Lesly Devereaux.
2. Embrace their individuality
It’s difficult to be confident or proud of something if you aren’t passionate on the matter. That’s why it’s so important that kids find their individuality at a young age, and embrace it!
“If you embrace your child’s uniqueness and understand their communication style, you’ll be able to help them build their confidence by choosing your words and tone carefully,” Smith claims.
Help your child to find what they’re passionate about, and help them to be proud and confident in whatever it is they enjoy. In time, they’ll be more confident about their passions and desires, which will translate to their overall self-esteem.
3. Don’t “overvalue” or “overpraise”
A 2015 Ohio State University study aimed to identify the root causes of narcissism. What they found is that it develops early in a person’s life. According to the study, parents who “overvalued” their children grew up to be narcissistic.
Oversaturating your child with unnecessary compliments and praises like, “you’re more special than other children” and “you deserve something extra in life,” can lead to an overinflated ego.
Smith and Devereaux agree that praise is necessary and should be distributed when due. However, they also concur in the idea that overvaluing your child can have harmful effects on their personality in the future. They suggest that whenever you give praise for a job well done to also point out areas in which you child can improve.
4. Conquer adversity
Dr. Devereaux claims that “children must see that there is the opportunity to overcome and move forward when faced with adversity.” Whenever your child is faced with adversity in their life, help them to understand that it is needed to grow stronger as an individual.
Kids need to know that there will be multitudinous problems thrown at them in every stage of their life. What’s important is that they use that adversity to achieve their goals, and never shy away from a challenge.
5. Let them fail
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As with adversity, children need to understand that failure is a part of life. Nothing in life is easy and as a result, we fail. The important thing is to learn from our mistakes and develop our weaknesses into our strength.
Smith suggests that parents should share some of their own failure as well as examples of how they bounced back from them. In the end, the goal is to make sure kids know that to get back on the horse, they’ll have to fall off first.
6. Teach the importance of teamwork
“Nobody gets to where they are by themselves,” Smith says. Let your children understand that no matter what they accomplish, they had help along the way and they should recognize others for their contribution.
Devereaux also believes that being a team player can result in a kid developing higher levels of confidence. “One of the best ways to boost your child’s self-esteem without becoming boastful is to teach him how to be a team player in any situation,” she claims.
7. Handle behaviour accordingly
It’s important for parents who want confident children to know that behaviour must be addressed. What does this mean? Basically, this means to treat behaviour and your child as two separate things.
If your kid makes a mistake when trying to accomplish something, let them know that their behaviour was at fault and not themselves as a person.
In Smith’s words, “When you speak to the behaviour, you’re telling them ‘I know that’s not who you really are and there’s a greater person within you.”
This article was inspired by a list published by Fox News.
READ: 5 Tips for raising smart and emotionally stable kids
