5 ways to communicate better with your spouse

Good communication is an integral part of a well-working relationship. Find out how you can better communicate with your partner with these five easy tips.

Listen and don't interrupt

It's important not to interrupt when your partner talks. You might think this is obvious but it is a lot tougher to do than you would think. So next time you’re in a conversation be aware how you listen and react to the other person. Are you the type who butts in midway while the other person talks because something they said triggers you?

If you’re that person, next time you’re talking or even arguing with your partner and you feel the impulse to talk over them, take a deep breath and count to five. This will allow your partner to finish what they have to say and for you to listen instead of talking over them.

Use 'I' statements

This is very useful as it allows you to break down the problem or issue into how it made you feel instead of making it a blame game. Using statements such as "I felt hurt" or "I felt left out" or "I felt jealous" allows both of you to explore the problem without directly attacking each other. It also allows you to avoid making the relationship’s problems all about your spouse when it might not necessarily be.

Say what you're thinking

Yes, this is obvious but you would be surprised just how many woman expect their man to read their minds or know what they’re thinking. If you want your man to know what he might be doing wrong or what is making you so mad, tell him. It is the responsibility of both husband and wife to communicate how they are really feeling instead of assuming that our partner will know what the problem is. A lack of communication could lead to miscommunication and even more frustrations from both sides.

Never go on the attack

Don’t ever go into an argument blaming your partner. By attacking them from the get go, you are inadvertently setting up a defensive mode of communicating. This is both unpleasant and counter-productive.

Play fair

We understand that tempers can flare in an argument and all prior frustrations and slighted feelings might be used as ammunition when you’re angry. But that’s just not playing fair and will not be constructive for any relationship.

Instead, allow your partner to state his case while you state yours. If you don’t agree, ask questions and if you feel yourself getting mad and ready to scream, take a time out. This allows you to calm down and prevents both parties from saying hurtful things in the heat of the moment that they might regret later.

Wafa Marican

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