Step mother and step father, we’ve decided to give you some tips when the going gets tough--hateful, hurtful and unacceptable words are hurled at you. How should you react?
Be patient and let the kid know that what they said was unnecessary and hurtful. Let them know that you were merely trying to be kind and loving to the best of your ability.
The first approach failed. Now, you can try to turn a deaf ear on the rude remarks. You could say: "As I said before, your comments are hurtful and not helpful in our relationship, so, I am ignoring your statements."
If cruel non-verbals and verbals continue, don’t despair. Ask your spouse to step in and have a chat with his or her child. The conversation should not be a blaming session or judgmental in anyway. Validate the child’s feelings but let him or her know that there are healthier ways of handling anger, frustrations or other negative feelings.
Talk it out and find a solution. Your spouse should tell the child not to take out those feelings on you—but both you and the child can work on this together and find a happy middle. If the biological parent on the other side is willing to help; the issue at hand may become easier to resolve.