12 New Year's resolutions I wish my toddler would make

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Between saying “put that vase down” and getting our toddlers to sit down to attempt completing a full sentence, we can be hopeful that they will make some promises for 2016. Here’s what I secretly wish MY kid’s list would look like:

#1 First goal of 2016: Sleep more.
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 #2 Wipe my nose on the sofa (and mummy’s blouse) less.

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#3 Pick up my Lego after play, so mummy and daddy won’t step over it every 3 minutes.
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#4 Work on my appearance. Less custard in my hair, more socks that match.
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#5 Understand that knives and ballpoint pens can’t be in my life the way I need them to be right now. I’m leaving them in 2015.
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#6 Cut out the excess in my life. Top of the list (as mum would like), the crazy amount of times I ask “why?” in an hour.
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#7 Accept that my older brother is also part of the family. Trying to kick him in his sleep isn’t going to make him vanish.
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#8 Work on my trust issues. When my dad tells me a power-slam on my little brother is not a good idea, I’m going to take their word for it.
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#9 Fix my diet. Why I can’t live on bread and nutella beats me, but I’ll find out if eating pasta with that red sauce is as earth-shattering as my mum makes it out to be.
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#10 Quit a bad habit. I will stop creating a mess under the coffee table, and blaming the dog for it.
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#11 Master the art of sharing. When my friends come over for a playdate, I should not lock myself in the room alone with my favourite game on Wii.
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#12 Bid farewell to the remote control. It has caused my family so much drama. Well, it may be ambitious, but 2016 is going to be all about pushing my limits.
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