As women, we play many different roles – from mother to daughter, from sister to wife – and they are all very complex and challenging to say the least.
How can you overcome the challenges of being a woman in the 21st century? Simple. Practice these four life skills.
1) Learn to communicate and express your feelings
2) Learn to set boundaries
3) Learn to love yourself
4) Learn to let go
Life Skill 1: Communication and Self-expression
To do a good job of communicating your feelings, it is imperative to first listen. Accept other people’s point of view. If someone needs you to do somethin, before saying yes immediately, take a moment to check if you have the time or ability to do the job, or project or errand. If you can’t, explain why you cannot do it and how you feel about doing or not doing it. You will gain respect from your self-expression.
Life Skill 2: Learn to Set Boundaries
People do not know what you are thinking, your lifestyle or whether you have the time or ability to do something. It is your responsibility to set boundaries of how much time you wish to spend with a friend who calls you up for coffee. Another example, could be a relative who wants you to accompany him or her to go somewhere when you have no business being there. Learn to say “No”. If you think saying “Yes” when you mean “No” is easier, then deep inside you, you will be eating yourself inside out! And quite frankly, is it their fault that you feel miserable? They are not mind-readers. It’s your responsibility to express yourself truthfully.
Life Skill 3: Learn to love yourself
By loving yourself I mean being aware of your mental, physical, emotional and spiritual well being. It’s not being self-centred, it’s self-care. If you can’t take care of yourself, how balanced can you be? How can you look after others? How can you be a role model?
Life Skill 4: Learn to let go
Many people I know are very hard on themselves. Being perfect is so important to them that they cannot take failure as a form of feedback. If you think being a perfect mother, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister and wife are very important roles, you will find yourself being torn apart and overwhelmed. Chances are you will feel very angry, guilty, and frustrated. Letting go of playing perfect roles is the first step to accepting yourself as who you are, whole and complete. Try it, it is liberating!
About the author
Dolly Yeo is the chief coach and founder of Mindset Coaching that specialises in life coaching. She is a Results Certified Coach (Australia). Member of the International Coach Federation, Singapore. Member of Asia Pacific Alliance of Coaches (APAC) She is also an Active Parenting Certified Leader as well as a Certified Parent Facilitator for Parenting Workshops. Find out more about Dolly Yeo and Mindset Coaching at mindsetcoaching.com or to subscribe to her free newsletters.
