Whether the host was Art Linkletter or Bill Cosby, Kids Say the Darndest Things and Art Linkletter’s House Party have been hits among many for a number of years. Children and their reactions to just about everything are not only humours but at times, thought provoking as well. This week, TheAsianparent takes a walk in the Community and picks out the top 10 cutest things submitted by our readers. Enjoy!
1. That’s LOVE
My hubby came back late one night and after his shower, he cuddled in the blanket with me, hugged me & smelled my hair. Being a light sleeper, I was unable to fall back to sleep again.
I was a bit cranky the next day due to sleep deprivation. My little boy asked, “Mummy, why are you so angry?” I told him Papa disturbed Mummy’s sleep last night. “What did Papa do to you?” he asked. I told him (above). My little boy smiled and said “Mummy, Papa was not disturbing you, it’s just LOVE!”
2. Bad Hair
I was combing my 6-year-old daughter’s hair and explained to her that if her hair is not kept nice as a child she will have bad hair as an adult…she looked up at me and said…”oh mommy so that is why you have bad hair now!”
3. Is India a Zoo?
Contributor: local hero
We were travelling by train from Delhi to Amritsar, when my son, who was 3 years old at that time, kept staring out the window. He saw the usual array of animals we normally see on Indian city streets, walking about: cows, horses, camels, dogs, chickens, and in one instance, also a performing bear walking beside its owner on a leash.
He turned to us and in an innocent manner, asked, “Papa… is India a zoo?”
My 5-yearr-old came dashing to the room “Mommy! Daddy!! Help! There’s an IGUANA in the living room”. Puzzled, Hubby and I looked at each other and ran out to check it out. We looked everywhere and we couldn’t find it… so we ask him “Where? Where is the IGUANA?”
He then pointed at a cute little lizard! Hubby and I tried so hard to conceal our laughter as we didn’t want to embarrass him. Then hubby went “Darling. You call that a lizard ok? Not an iguana.”
The day before, we had been watching VCDs on animals and insects.
5. “Mummy, Blueberry in My Nose!”
I’ve been giving my 2 and a half year old boy cereal with dried blueberries for his breakfast, and he has grown to be a big fan of dried blueberries.
Recently, he had a bout of flu and as he was recovering. I found him in distress one day, crying for help and shouting “Mummy, I got blueberry in my nose!”. I did not understand what he was trying to say. I was getting desperate at the sound of distress in his voice as he kept repeating “Mummy, I got blueberry in my nose!” getting more and more agitated each time. That’s when I suddenly realised that he wanted me to remove a big piece of dried mucous that was stuck in his nose!
After I removed “the blueberry”, my husband and I couldn’t stop laughing. What an apt description, given that my son currently has a limited vocabulary and the dried mucous did indeed resemble a dried blueberry!
6. Two Wives
This is the conversation between my 6-year-old son, Dio, and me.
Dio: Mummy, I think I have to marry two wives.
Dio: Because I love Xuan mei mei and want to marry her but Lijin mei mei also want me to marry her. No choice, I have to marry both.
Dio: Mummy, is it more painful to have a boy or girl??
Me: I don’t know. I only have you and di di (younger brother)
Dio: Well, I think boy will be more painful.
Dio: Di di kick you everyday when he was in your tummy. Xuan mei mei seldom kick yiyi (Aunty)
Me: Maybe you are right. But why did you ask?
Dio: I want a boy and a girl in future. So I was thinking who should bear me a girl and who should bear me a boy. I think since bearing a boy is more painful then I’ll let Lijin meimei bear a boy. I love Xuan mei mei so let her bear a girl which is not so painful. (Happily nodding his head)
7. Have a New Tattoo, Mama!
Contributor: Donsancho Tse
Coming back one day, I was showing my hubby and kids my new touched up tattoo…Suddenly, my gal just blurted out “Mama, you should have a tattoo on your forehead saying – I AM MARRIED, so that those men, whom Papa always complains about, will stop looking at you.” We just burst out into laughter…including herself as she thought it was a good idea!
8. Computer Language!
My son, when he was about five years old, started using the computer a lot. I did not realise how much the computer language was in his vocabulary until one night. I was reading him a story and putting him to sleep. He wanted his teddy bear to be left on the floor beside his bed. He gave it to me and said “Mama download my teddy!”
9. The Big Mama
Contributor: Jenny Lim
My son who just turned 4 this year has been attending kindergarten since beginning of the year. He came back from kindy one day and practised writing the Chinese character “Men” (Door). However, the character was horribly written because he wrote it very big and fat. Upon seeing this, I asked him to erase it and write properly but he refused by saying that I will not be able to enter if he wrote it smaller.
According to my niece, syntax is actually the tax that people must pay after they have sinned.
If you have more funny kids quotes, please share them on the comment box below.