In Singapore, life runs on schedules. School bells, clinic slots, project deadlines. But fertility doesn’t read calendars. If you’re counting months, then cycles, then costs, you know the quiet ache of wanting a child in a world that keeps moving.
Meet Anna Bervander — designer, founder, and IVF mum to twins Emil and Aksel — who became a first-time mother at 41 after two failed IUIs, six failed IVFs, and a miscarriage. On her seventh IVF, with a husband who stood steady and a freelance design life, she bent toward healing, she changed pace, shifted mindset, sought integrative care, and won the kind of joy you can’t schedule.
Her compass is simple: “Each IVF cycle is a new chance—don’t be afraid to change things up. Most of all, find a specialist you fully trust.”
An IVF Mum Who Turned Privacy Into Purpose
You may be keeping it quiet. Anna did, too.
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“I didn’t really share it with so many friends… I kept it a little bit secret, which I think is the wrong thing to do.”
Like many women a decade and a half ago, Anna kept her fertility struggles private. IVF carried a stigma then—seen by some as a failure, whispered about behind closed doors. But time and distance gave her a new perspective. Today, she believes openness is a strength, a lifeline for others walking the same road.
What she learned was sobering: fertility challenges are rarely just a “woman’s problem.” Sometimes, both partners are less fertile than average. Sometimes the science reveals no single culprit at all. That understanding reframed her sense of identity—not as a woman at fault, but as a mother-in-waiting, navigating a system still catching up with human complexity.
Patience, Identity, And Work
The journey reshaped who she is.
“Because it took such a long time… I’ve become even more patient… all the hard things… will actually help you to become a better parent.” That patience now powers twin-mum life.
Creatively, pregnancy pulled her design eye toward childhood. The longtime graphic designer started sketching babywear and co-founded Lagom Kids, a Singapore label with Swedish-clean, playful sensibilities—clothes built for movement and imagination.
“Simple, clean, playful.”
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In humid Singapore, she chose good quality cotton because “it’s very important… ultimately the best for the skin.”
An IVF Mum Slows The Spin
What changed before the seventh round? Pace. Pressure. And support.
Under the care of her IVF specialist, Dr. Nair at Mount Elizabeth, and with the added support of acupuncture, Anna found ways to slow down. She also stopped pushing her body to extremes: “If you’re one of those women that tend to push yourself very hard… you should mellow off a little bit. Give yourself a break.”
It isn’t about letting health slide.
“It doesn’t mean that you should sit on the sofa and eat tons of sugar… don’t push yourself to extremes.”
Then came the scan. Two embryos in. “He found one heartbeat… then he found the other heartbeat.” Her husband cracked the line only couples on this road truly feel: “Two for the price of one.”
What Every IVF Mum Needs From A Partner
Your partner matters more than perfect timing.
“He was a rock through the whole thing.” After a miscarriage, she collapsed into grief. “I just cried… it’s very important for the husbands to just be there… You don’t necessarily need to say so much… just be there.” And then the wisdom every supportive spouse should memorise: “Let the women take the lead… it is their body… be there as a gentle, calm support through the whole journey.”
Source: Anna Bervander
Between cycles, she adopted a dog. Caring for a puppy, she says, helped “nurture those… maternal feelings” when hope felt thin.
The Day It Finally Happened
When her water broke at 4 a.m., Anna was more focused on getting to the hospital than making sense of the moment. By 7:02 and 7:03, her twin sons were born by C-section. Relief came first, then the reality of parenthood.
Source: Anna Bervander
Years of energy had been spent on simply getting pregnant; now she had to learn, quickly, what it meant to raise two newborns at once. The early years were relentless, but the reward was profound. As her boys grew, so did her gratitude. What lingers is not the pain of the journey, but the fullness of finally arriving.
What an IVF Mum Wants You to Try Next
Source: Anna Bervander
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Dial Down The Extremes. “Take a chill pill.” If you’re a hard-training, late-night, always-on parent, throttle back before the next cycle.
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Invite Support. Tell trusted people; secrecy makes the load heavier.
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Consider Complements. “TCM… acupuncture… I do believe it can really help… the quality of your egg.”
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Choose Your Person. “Find a specialist you fully trust.”
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Protect Belief. “Don’t… have a backup plan… go into it completely… fully believing that you’re going to succeed.”
Beyond Statistics, Toward Story
Source: Anna Bervander
For all the numbers—success rates, costs, failures—the story of an IVF mum is not reducible to percentages. It is lived in hospital waiting rooms, in whispered conversations, in the quiet recalibration of identity and ambition.
Anna’s twins are now 11. Her journey still stirs emotion, not from pain but from gratitude. In a city where parents are known to invest in tuition, enrichment, and every advantage, her story offers another kind of investment: patience, openness, and faith in both science and self.
Because sometimes, the greatest resilience is not in powering through, but in slowing down, resetting, and believing that the next cycle could be the one.
