All mums lose their tempers, especially if they catch their child engaging in undesirable behaviour. But this story about a mother who really lost it when she caught her child stealing will shock you to your core.
In a video filmed in China's south-western Yunnan Province, a ruthless mother was seen punishing her child after she caught him stealing from the house.
She was reportedly seen dragging her son behind her scooter in a video shot by a passerby, as punishment for the deed.
The disturbing footage shows the boy's hands tied to a rope. This rope was connected to the rear of the scooter. In the video, the boy is also seen lying flat on his tummy, crying as his mother dragged him across the road.
The child stealing from his parents was the REAL reason!
The mother reportedly wanted to teach her son a lesson for stealing from her. When confronted about the harsh punishment, the mother told a passerby the primary reason.
She shared that her son stole 2,000 RMB (SGD400) of the family's savings. She added that it was her husband's entire month's savings as he brings in 3,000 RMB (SGD500) per month.
"I've been punishing him for two or three days," she admitted on camera.
In response, the woman who shot the video told the ruthless mum, "Forget a biological mother. Not even a stepmum is allowed to treat a child like this!"
Soon after the video went viral, local police took the mother and the son in for questioning. It was during this time that the mother shared that she knew of the child stealing from them. Her intention was to get her son to admit his crime. Or cough up all the money he stole.
The police let the mother go after a verbal warning.
This case has come as a brutal reminder to the parenting community across the globe, who are now debating whether such harsh physical punishments actually help.
Is physical punishment justified if you find your child stealing for you?
A recent study published in PubMed reveals that harsh physical punishments for kids who are considered difficult to handle can have serious consequences.
"As consequences of harsh parental punishment and rejection as perceived by the child, two types of personality problems were observed: a syndrome named 'Conduct Disorder' and a syndrome including personality problems such as anxiety and helplessness," the study revealed.
Physical violence is thus, never the answer. More often than not it backfires and can have the following consequences as well.
1. Harsh punishments sabotage a child's ability to learn new behaviour
You may notice that harsh punishments only stop children from repeating the same behaviour again.
For instance, if you caught your child stealing and punished him, he won't steal again. That's because he doesn't want the same punishment. But he will not learn what to do instead.
So harsh punishments teach kids 'what not to do' and not the ideal 'what to do.'
2. Harsh punishment undermines your relationship
If you use harsh physical punishments for each of your child's mistakes, he will no longer share a close bond with you. In fact, sometimes kids develop a sense of personal threat when they are often punished.
This leads them to concentrate on their safety, and they look elsewhere for love and security.
Even more, your kids might no longer confide in you for emotional support. As a result, you lose any closeness with each other.
3. Harsh punishment is the beginning to aggressive behaviour
In many cases, harsh punishment can give rise to aggressive behaviour in kids. Because children often imitate their parent's behaviour, the way you act with them is the exact way they will act with others.
So if there is physical violence in the house, chances are your kid will become violent as well.
In 1961, psychologist Albert Bandura proved this using a Bodo doll. The conclusion was simple. "Children learn social behaviour such as aggression through the process of observation learning – through watching the behaviour of another person."
So remember all of this the next time you give a harsh punishment or raise your hand at your kids.
Sources: PubMed, MSN, Simply Psychology
Also read: 6 ways to reprimand your kids without yelling