Bonnie Loo has revealed that she had a bad breakup earlier this year following a toxic relationship.
The 29-year old Malaysian singer-actress, who is based in Singapore, first broke the news in an episode of HTHT with actress Hazelle Teo and elaborated on it on the latest episode of Mediacorp’s YouTube series, JustSwipeLah.
Bonnie said that she had dated the man, who is not from showbiz, for close to two years.
“This relationship had caused me a lot of sadness, but after this experience, I have grown from it,” said Bonnie.
She added that she and her ex-boyfriend started out as friends and even before they were officially dating, she noticed that he has a close female friend.
“I have asked him about his state of relationship with the woman and he told me that they were just friends. But after we started dating, there were some red flags, like him not replying to some of my messages,” Bonnie shared.
“I also found out later that the woman was staying in his home.”
When Bonnie brought up her concerns to her ex-boyfriend then, he laughed it off. She didn’t pursue further but later discovered from his mother that they even shared a room.
“I found out from his mother that while we were in a relationship, the woman was actually staying in his home. I thought that she rented a room from them, but later I heard they slept in the same room,” Bonnie revealed.
When she asked the man’s mother about his relationship with the girl, his mother said that because the room that the woman rented does not have a bed, so they are sleeping in the same room.
‘How could I have tolerated such a thing?’
Later, after the man sold his home, he told Bonnie that he would be staying with a colleague temporarily.
But she later found out that his temporary residence was just 5 minutes away from this female friend’s home.
A few days later, he even asked Bonnie whether he could stay with this friend as she was offering him cheap rent.
Bonnie asked him: “Why don’t you stay with me? Why do you want to stay with her?”
However, the man had actually already moved in with this female friend even before asking Bonnie, as the latter found out from the address on his NRIC later.
Recalling the situation, Bonnie said: “I think I was quite silly, because how could I have tolerated such a thing?”
When he moved out of the place earlier this year, Bonnie thought that things would be better, but soon realised that he did not change the address on his identity card and also did not return the house keys to his female friend.
“What I was actually uncomfortable with was that this woman is also in the same industry as me,” she shared.
Bonnie added that she had thought she had misunderstood the woman at one point, but soon realised that the woman also reciprocated her boyfriend’s actions, referring to him as her “soulmate” in her social media post.
Some of Bonnie’s celeb pals would even ask her if she was sure she wasn’t being cheated on as her boyfriend would be seen frequently with this woman. He also didn’t invite Bonnie to certain gatherings where the other party would be present.
Eventually, Bonnie and her then-boyfriend went on a break, but he continued bringing the woman to gatherings, and when asked about their relationship status, they kept silent, seemingly to agree that they were already in a romantic relationship.
He owes money
The host Juin Teh of JustSwipeLah asked Bonnie if she would feel awkward having to work together with the woman in the future.
“I think the one who is awkward is not me,” Bonnie said with a laugh.
Bonnie added that she had intended to break off all contact with her ex-boyfriend, but admitted they still have some unfinished business to discuss, including a six-figure loan he took from her.
“Last year, he told me he met with some challenges in his business and sought my help. At that point, I thought that he would be someone who would walk together with me… and he told me he was stressed. So I wished to help him then,” she said.
She added that her ex-boyfriend has since given her an estimated timeline of when he would repay her by.
When asked what she has learnt from this experience, Bonnie shared that while relationship matters are hard to predict, she has learnt not to ignore the red flags and her own perception.
“I would learn to love myself better,” said Bonnie, choking in tears.
She added that she would spend more effort on her career now and accept another relationship only at the right time.