There is an old Chinese saying which basically says that 'guys should only be able to shed blood, but never tears' and even till this day, many people still subscribe to this age old adage. Many parents raise boys and girls differently according to prevailing gender norms and thus do would not believe in the notion that boys should be allowed to cry. However, due to the constraints of societal expectations, many parents fail to realise the benefits in the notion that boys should be allowed to cry. Here are 4 very good reasons why boys should be allowed to cry.
Why boys should be allowed to cry
1. Higher self-esteem
If you are going to reprimand your child every time he cries, he is going to start viewing crying as a sin and a sign of weakness. This will inevitably cause him to feel guilty every time he cries which is certainly not healthy to his self-esteem levels. Furthermore, it is difficult to try to repress tears when they are bursting to come out and it will cause your child unnecessary feelings of stress every time he tries to suppress his crying urges.
Thus, boys should be allowed to cry as it will likely give him higher self-esteem. Some boys are naturally more sensitive to others and it is unrealistic to expect every single boy to be the tough. If your boy is particularly sensitive, let him know that there is nothing wrong with crying and he won't be subjected to the unnecessary difficulties associated with trying to mould him into the stereotypical tough guy.
2. Emotionally healthy
Another reason why boys should be allowed to cry is that it will likely result in him becoming more emotionally healthier. By allowing your boy to fully express his feelings, he will learn to understand them better and grow up to be a much more emotionally healthier person compared to his peers who are forced to suppress their feelings. This will likely also allow him to build and develop more meaningful relationships with others as he is ready to open himself up to others and open communication is a huge factor in contributing to any healthy relationship, particularly romantic ones. Furthermore, crying is a healthy process as it allows the boy to vent his frustrations and he will also feel better after a good sob.
3. Respect
There is also a need to respect your child's feelings. Remember that your boy is also a human being and thus deserves the freedom to express his own feelings and emotions. Do not condemn him for feeling sad and depressed just because gender stereotypes posit that boys should be tough at all times and not ever be affected by their emotions. Allowing your boy to cry is not going to harm anyone but reprimanding him for emotions he has little control over will likely have detrimental effects on his growth and well-being. This could also result in your boy growing up to become a man who respects the feelings of others because you learnt to respect his feelings.
4. Changing gender norms
The final reason why boys should be allowed to cry is because it is becoming increasingly acceptable for boys to do so. While the tough masculine alpha males epitomised by stars like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis used to be the definition of masculinity, the evolution of masculinity can best be seen by the emergence of the sensitive new age guy. Sensitivity is increasingly becoming a desirable quality which men should possess and it is becoming increasingly acceptable for men to cry nowadays.