Let’s start with a funny quote by Rodney Danferfield: "I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio." OK, we doubt that you're lumped in this category of "crazy parents" but here are 10 things that make you and your spouse unbearable parents.
Unreasonable parents use force!
It can be difficult at times when you want the best for your child but he or she refuses to budge on the matter. Realise this-- your child is unique and is his or her own person. They may not always go according to your will. You may argue that they don’t know better. Agreed…this is a delicate battle. However, there are certain things that you should NEVER force your child to do. Click on the related links below to find out what they are.
Unreasonable parents are violent and aggressive
Some parents believe that they should cane their children or slap them when they do something wrong, even if it is a tiny mistake, but violence is never the solution. In fact, violence may trigger even more violence. So think twice before bringing your hand down on your child. There are other disciplinary measures you can resort to.
Unreasonable parents are never patient
Remember that your child is learning as they go along and they may not grasp abstract concepts as fast as you. Don’t be impatient; give them some time and space to get it. They will eventually learn –but at a pace that is comfortable for them.
Unreasonable parents lash out No matter how big your problem is—never unleash your anger on the poor child. They may internalize the attack and blame themselves for your anger issues, eventually leading to poor self-esteem and other behavioural issues.
Unreasonable parents deny a child’s right to privacy
Tempted to read your child’s journal? Never do it! Once you lose that trust, it is gone forever. For one, your kid will be scarred and they might never want to tell you anything intimate ever again. There goes that bond! Note that you should still monitor your children for safety purposes but know your limits and where you should draw the line.
Unreasonable parents kindle hatred for the ex-spouse
As a parent, please act like a grown-up. Never speak evil behind your ex-spouse’s back. What good will that do? If your intention is to cozy up to your kid and make your kid hate your ex—please stop. Your child needs to know that they were conceived in love and not hate. The last thing you want to do is involve your child in the "war" of exes.
Unreasonable parents demand too much
Demanding your kid to excel beyond their capacities and punishing them when they cannot score straight A’s will leave a detrimental emotional impact. They will feel frustrated and think that they are not good enough resulting to esteem issues. What matters most is that they do their very best.
Just remember that everything you do or say to your kid has a consequence—they are sponges that absorb EVERYTHING. You’re responsible for forming their worldview.
Unreasonable parents unload their burdens
Life is tough and you may have financial problems or issues at work. No matter how difficult it may get for you—NEVER—unload your adult burdens on your children. Do you really think their tiny minds can handle grown-up matters? They deserve a childhood that is problem-free, for as long as it lasts. Don’t rob them of carefree years.
Unreasonable parents misbehave
Not all parents know better. In fact, some adults act like kids and misbehave in front of their children. Bear in mind that you are the living example to your kids. Your kids look up to you. So if you want them to turn out well, then remember that they are watching your every move. Don’t dress immodestly, lie, curse but expect your kids to be perfect angels. You are a role model, do what you need to do to preserve your child’s innocence—for as long as you can.
Any views or opinions expressed in this article are personal and belong solely to the author; and do not represent those of theAsianparent or its clients.