Things I just won’t do for my daughter’s birthday

"If we surprise our daughter with an iPad or a trip to Disney for her 3rd birthday, what will she expect when she’s 8, 11 or 16?"

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While some parents go out of their way to give their children the best things in life come hell or high water, this one mother confessed that she would rather not.

In her Scary Mommy article, Leah Baacke shared that her daughter was soon turning three, and because birthdays bring out the worst in mothers, especially with all the pressure put in them, she decided to vent her frustrations.

She isn’t the perfect mother, and there are many things that she’s simply not up for, and that’s okay. She shared these things in the hope that mothers like her could feel better about themselves.

1. A Pinterest Party

If you have all the time and patience and energy to organize and throw a party worth pinning, then more power to you, said Lea, but she has neither of all those things.

When she was growing up she celebrated her birthdays with a cake and a watermelon and by running around sprinklers and still had a blast.

“For my daughter’s party, I bought Doc McStuffins plates and napkins from Walmart and Doc McStuffins crayons, coloring books, and puzzles from the Dollar Tree.

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“We’ll have toys and balloons out, but there will be no organized games, bouncy houses, Etsy banners, or treat bags. Keep it simple, sisters, and let the kiddos use their imaginations.”

2. A Homemade Cake

“I baked her for 10 months in my belly. That’s all I’ve got. Truthfully, I admire mums who can do this, but for me, it seems like one more thing to stress out about.”

And while the idea of baking seems sound, the prospect of icing and decorating gives her nightmares. She’d settle for some store-bought cupcakes.

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3. Pets

“We just got our girl potty-trained,” she said. “I really cannot bring anything else that poops into our house.”

Although she kept thinking that they would have to provide their daughter a playmate soon, in the form of a dog or a sibling, now is not the time.

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4. An Expensive Gift

“Some of the best parenting advice we’ve received came from our pediatrician: ‘Parenting is a marathon, not a sprint.’

“If we surprise our daughter with an iPad or a trip to Disney for her 3rd birthday, what will she expect when she’s 8, 11 or 16? How could we possibly keep that up?”

In the end, Leah says, her daughter may not have the fanciest party or the flashiest gifts, but she will be surrounded by her loved ones. There won’t be a rented out gymnasium or an ice rink, but people are “welcome into her favorite play space—our home.”

“To the world, it may be understated, but to us it’s just right. Besides, if this list helps even one mum to take some pressure off herself, well, that’s just icing on the store-bought cake.”

If you have any insights, questions or comments regarding the topic, please share them with us. 

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Written by

James Martinez