Dating is complicated enough as it is. But when one gets ghosted, it adds a different layer of complexity. In a TikTok video posted on Wednesday (Nov 23), influencer Nicole Choo revealed that she was ghosted by a man she was in a relationship with.
For those on the lookout for some spilling of tea, you might be left slightly disappointed.
Nicole mentioned that she had no intention to spite anyone or bring up any names.
“This is just me merely sharing because I still think it’s very bizarre,” she said.
The 23-year-old met the man through a friend and they began hanging out in a group setting.
Over time, the duo developed feelings for each other with Nicole mentioning how their values and beliefs seemed to align.
If you’re responding with paragraph-long replies and chatting away throughout the day, the relationship must be going well, right?
Not in this case though.
An early red flag was raised by a netizen who’d seen an earlier TikTok video Nicole had posted of the couple’s conversation.
The netizen suggested that Nicole was being love bombed.
According to Healthline, this term refers to a situation where an individual overwhelms their partner with loving words, actions and behaviour.
It is understood to be a manipulation technique.
Nicole brushed off any notion of love bombing as the relationship “felt genuine”.
However, she did not discount the possibility of trauma bonding.
Trauma bonding occurs when an abused person forms an unhealthy bond with the one who abuses them.
“It made the relationship more intense,” she said.
The man would consistently have breakdowns and “disappear” and this was taking a toll on Nicole but she did not want to admit it back then.
“Up till now, honestly nobody knows what’s going on with him,” she confessed.
If it’s of any comfort to Nicole, she’s not alone when it comes to being ghosted.
In the comments section, a number of TikTok users empathised with her.
In fact, ghosting is a relatively common occurrence when it comes to the dating scene in Singapore.
A recent survey from the dating app Bumble found that three in five Singaporean singles have either ghosted someone or been ghosted before.
Of the respondents, 61 per cent have been ghosted before. Those who’ve been ghosted indicated that the experience made them less confident and wary when it came to dating.