Is French-style parenting for your kids?

In the latest cross-cultural parenting manual Pamela Druckerman writes that the French laissez-faire method of raising children has its advantages too.

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In 2011, Amy Chua the ‘Tiger Mother’ told American parents how to raise their children and sparked off a widespread debate about parenting (got a response from a self-styled Panda Dad, Alan Paul ) and this year, Druckerman’s new book Bringing Up Bébé:One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting promises to trigger off similar discussions about the most ideal way to bring up children.

Bringing up children abroad

Druckerman is a former Wall Street Journal reporter who moved to Paris in 2003 and gave birth to a daughter and twin boys with her British husband. While residing in Paris, Druckerman noticed that French children were generally more well-behaved in public than American children: they threw less tantrums and sat in restaurants as they accompanied their parents. She concluded that French children were taught to fit into their parents’ life, rather than vice-versa in America.

Criticism from home

The book has already come under fire, understandably from the American media. Druckerman is charged with making sweeping cultural generalisations and assumptions in her writing. One possible reason for the criticisms of Druckerman is that few parents like being compared to their counterparts in other countries. All parents live in societies with different cultural expectations and circumstances. It should be noted that French mothers have more access to state-subsidised childcare, medical benefits and maternity leave than other countries.

Doing your best – wherever you come from

In the end, any advice to be more like the parents of another culture or society may not apply to your specific situation. It may be an interesting exercise to step outside Asian culture just to compare and contrast the differences and expectations. Although Druckerman’s book bears the subtitle, “wisdom of French parenting,” bear in mind some good advice can be found in various styles of parenting..No parenting style is perfect and there is no such thing as the perfect parent.

So rather than sifting about the latest parenting opinions and guides, take a good look at what you are giving your children in terms of love and upbringing. Whether you are an American, a French or an Asian parent.

Sources

Bringing up Bebe

Online WSJ

Copyright (c) 123RF Stock Photos
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Written by

Sandra Ong