I like to get together with friends once a while. It gives me time to meet my friends and fellow moms. It also allows play dates for my children. These get-togethers are fun times for my complete family.
Recently, my friend Sheena invited two to three friends of hers and their children for a small get-together at her home. I was excited to see her again after seven long years. The kids, on the other hand, are always happy to just play with other children.
Sheena is mother of five-year old Joy, a cute kid who loves to collect toy, cars and bikes. He has a huge collection of toy vehicles, as being an only child, he is pampered and loved by everyone in the family.
After the introductions, all the kids started playing and we mothers got busy in chatting. Everything was going fine until children discovered Joy’s toy collection. Everybody got fascinated and wanted to play with all of the toys.
However, Joy didn’t like other children touching his toys, and he asked them to please not play with his toys. But kids being kids, they kept trying to do so. Joy cried and screamed, and Sheena tried everything to console him. She told him, too, to share his toys even for only a few minutes with everyone. But Joy was stubborn and not ready to heed the request.
We tried to take our kids’ attention away from Joy’s toys. We also tried to calm Joy for a while, but when one kid found a toy car under the sofa, he started hitting him. The kid was rescued, but Joy wouldn’t calm down. He started throwing things in the house and a crying party soon followed. It became difficult for us to control the children.
Joy didn’t calm down, and Sheena, who was very embarrassed, slapped him to stop him from hitting the other children.
This is when she told us that Joy is not used to mingling with other children. He doesn’t have friends because of it and no one wants to come and play with him. He doesn’t share his belongings and hits other children. Sheena was feeling helpless and has stopped going out or inviting children at home because of her son’s aggressive behaviour.
Sheena has taken many efforts already by buying a number of toys and trying to teach him to share. But she’s clueless about Joy’s behaviour and already feeling helpless. She knows that slapping him isn’t the right way.
Sheena is not the only mother who is facing this problem. There are many other moms whose kids do not share and get into fights.
Following are some easy ways for teaching children the importance of sharing
1. Help children to become sociable
When children meet other children regularly or more often, they learn social skills and how to behave with others. School, classes, and activity centers are really helpful for this. Try to accompany children to family gatherings, birthday parties, and festive occasions where they can meet other children and adults.
2. Narrate stories about sharing
Children love to listen stories as they learn to imagine from them. Parents can try teaching kids value of sharing by using stories. Frame a story which narrates the importance of sharing or how sharing helps everyone. Sharing your things give happiness, blessings, and many friends too.
3. Model sharing
Try to show the importance of sharing by modeling. As children are great observers and learners, they learn by looking at adults in the house. Show a small act of sharing your things with your friends, family, and helpers. Share your food, books, and accessories with others and share how sharing gives happiness to all. When you share something with your helper, your child is going to observe it and follow it.
4. Take the help of cartoons
Children love cartoons undoubtedly. If their favourite cartoon character is kind to others, they will also try to be kind. Watch these cartoons with your child and explain or comment on what you’re seeing. Children definitely get influenced by their favourite cartoons characters and their kind acts.
5. Schools/ classes /education centres
School is where children spend most of their time and learn new things. It will be great if your child’s school arranges knowledge sharing session on how to share. More than their parents children listen to their teachers and this exactly thing will help them to learn good values. Teachers can set examples by sharing things and show appreciation when students display sharing.