10 Hilarious (but Accurate) Indications That You’re a Mum

This funny mum shares the hysterical ways you can clearly identify mummies! Check out the list here!

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This funny mum shares the hysterical ways you can clearly identify mummies! Check out the list here!

It’s pretty easy to point out a mum in the middle of a crowd. Sure, the most obvious giveaway is the toddler by her side holding her hand…but let’s say she was standing there without a kid. Would you still be able to point her out? You may be surprised, but yeah–you probably could!

For better or worse, moms have some pretty distinct qualities about themselves that extend far past their physical appearance. Kylie Blenkhorn, a first-time mom, writer and part-time paralegal, had posted a hilarious list of these mommy tells on The Huffington Post, and quite frankly…they’re hysterically accurate.

Check out this mum’s hilarious list of signs and indications that you’re a mum and let us know if they’re accurate! Also, let us know what she may have forgotten in her list!

1.  Your handbag contains at least 3 of the following:

  • a half-eaten granola bar;
  • a pair of underpants that are not yours;
  • more cookie crumbs than an Oreo factory;
  • half a dozen broken crayons; or
  • all of the above.

**other acceptable answers include a red hot wheel car, a blue hot wheel car, a half-licked lollipop & three apples each with one bite out of it**

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2. You own more pairs of yoga pants than you do jeans but haven’t attended a yoga class since 2012.

3. At least one meal a day consists of toast crusts, a ½ eaten cheese string and a handful of grapes, cut into quarters.

4.  Dinner is no longer spent eating your own food, but instead, pretending to “steal” vegetables off of someone else’s plate in an attempt to encourage (read: trick)  them into eating them.

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5. You catch yourself humming a pleasing little tune only to realize its the theme song to Baby Shark or Disney’s “Frozen”.

6.  You don’t know the name of Drake’s latest single but can confidently name all members of the Paw Patrol.

7.  You want to murder Caillou.

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8.  You sympathise with Peppa Pig’s parents and understand why George is always crying.

9.  You drive an extra 5 minutes out of the way to avoid going past the park because you’ve run out of excuses for why it is “closed” today.

10.  You make a silent promise to God that if he reinstates nap time you will use the hour and a half of peace & quiet to empty the dishwasher and fold laundry instead of eating M&Ms while catching up on your DVR recordings.

and a bonus...

11. You read this list and can relate to at least half of it!

 

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Kylie Blenkhorn's original article was published by The Huffington Post