What will the future of families in Singapore be like if Ng Kok Song were to become president?
In a candid one-on-one interview with theAsianparent Group CEO and Founder, Roshni Mahtani Cheung, the presidential hopeful opens up about how his childhood has influenced his leadership style and values, his reaction to people’s opinion on his relationship with fiancé Sybil Lau, how meditation addresses the issues of mental health and population growth, and his plans for the future of families in Singapore.
Ng Kok Song on how his humble childhood shaped his leadership style
Mr. Ng grew up in a fishing village where his father worked as a fish auctioneer at the market. He was the second of 11 children, each cared for by their stay-at-home mother. Coming from a poor family, he attributes the many challenges and hardships he faced during his childhood to the values and aspirations that have shaped him as a leader.
Mr. Ng recounts:
“I grew up in a very poor family with my brothers and five sisters. My father lost his job when I was 18 years old. So I had to work whilst still going through a university education to support the family.
“One day, when my mother had gone to the neighbour's to borrow money for me to buy school books, she came home with tears in her eyes and said, ‘Kok Song, our neighbours have got no money to lend us.’
“I was 12 years old and I still remember, at that moment, I resolved that I did not want to see my mother cry again. So that fortified me and galvanised me to study hard.
“And thankfully, God gave me a good brain. So I was able to do very well in school. I went to university, got a good job, and I was able to lift our family above poverty.”
When asked about what he learned in his childhood that has continued to influence his leadership style today, Mr. Ng answers, “Compassion and empathy with those who are poor. Because those who are poor, particularly these days, they don't have an equal start in life. And so they are at a disadvantage.
“And the second thing is that when you're a leader, you want to help the people who will work with you to develop to their fullest potential… Because in that way, the leader multiplies himself. The more people [he] can develop, the more capable successes he has, the better it is.
To Mr. Ng, the ability to instil empathy in people and to help them reach their full potential are among the traits that make him a qualified president of Singapore.
"The president of Singapore must be able to connect with the aspirations of the people of Singapore—and that's extremely important,” he muses.
“The president is a father figure and a mother figure, right? So people look up to the president, and I'm an example of social mobility in Singapore. I feel that my own personal life is an example of how young people from disadvantaged backgrounds can have hope and optimism. I think that is an important role."
Ng Kok Song clarifies his relationship with fiancé Sybil Lau
In today's society where everything is seen on social media, some personal life choices can often be the subject of scrutiny and judgment, especially for a presidential candidate.
With a 30-year age gap between Presidential Hopeful Ng Kok Song and Sybil Lau, aged 75 and 45, respectively, their relationship has sparked conversations and raised eyebrows.
But, as Mr. Ng explains, it's important not to form opinions without knowing the facts. He expresses firmly:
"We decided to be very upfront and to tell our story because we do not want people to form the wrong judgments or wrong opinions without the facts.
Sybil, first of all, she's a Singaporean. She's lived in Singapore for 18 years. She's an investment professional. She's an equal partner. And in many ways, she's wiser than me.
[I’m not] really too concerned about the 30 years age difference. I think what's more important is to say, ‘Is there a real gap in terms of your biological age?’ I think, chronologically, I'm 75, but I like to say that I'm a healthy 60-year-old."
While his relationship diverges from the public image of the previous presidents of Singapore, Mr. Ng doesn’t see it as a challenge to the expectations that Singaporeans may have of their future president.
“What is wrong with my relationship? Being a president cannot fall in love?” he counters.
“I think we have to ask, ‘Is it a proper relationship?’ I shared publicly something which, you know, normally you don't want to share because it's nobody's business. But because I'm selling for president, I become the people's business. Alright.
“So we decided to tell our story… My wife died 18 years ago. I was a widower for 14 years and then, unexpectedly, I met Sybil and fell in love with her.
“We were planning to get married. Her mom passed away just about two years ago. And the custom, in the Chinese custom and I think it’s also the custom in other traditions, is that you have a mourning period. So we wanted to wait until the three years were over before we got married.”
Ng Kok Song on his plans to address income gaps and in creating more job opportunities for the poor
In any government, the role of the president is multifaceted, varying from ceremonial duties to addressing the key challenges that the nation faces.
According to Mr. Ng, the income gap is the primary challenge that needs attention in Singapore. While the country has made significant progress in terms of economic growth, the income gap persists, with the high-income group moving up faster than the low-income group.
Mr. Ng believes that addressing this issue is critical for the social unity of the country, and the government must take steps to ensure that the low-income group does not get left behind.
However, he argues that the Gini Coefficient Gap, which is often used as a measure of income inequality, is not suitable for Singapore due to the unique structure of the society.
The Gini Coefficient refers to a summary measure of income inequality. It is equal to zero in the case of total income equality and to one in the case of total inequality.
Singapore has been using Gini Coefficient to measure household income inequality. In a press release by the Department of Statistics Singapore last February 2023, it was indicated that the country's Gini Coefficient fell from 0.444 in 2021 to 0.437 last year, 2022 (based on household income from work per household member before Government transfers and taxes).
He clarifies:
"How do we continue to make more progress in terms of reducing the income gap? Because we have had very good economic progress over the years, but it's like two escalators: the higher-income group, the escalator is going up faster, and the low-income group, the escalator is also going up, but slower.
“The Gini Coefficient Gap is not a good measure because of the structure of our society.
“Because if you look at the highest income group, it’s inflated by, for example, a lot of foreigners who are very wealthy coming to Singapore. So it inflates the numbers.
“And then at the lower end as well, if we look at the entire population, including the migrant workers, it brings down the number… So it's not a very good, accurate measure.
“I think the most important thing in terms of speeding up the slow escalator is opportunities—job opportunities, especially."
Ng Kok Song argues to provide mental health support for families to increase birth rates in Singapore
Mental health challenges continue to be a pressing issue in today's society, particularly when it comes to families. Mr. Ng emphasises the need for resources that address mental health issues at their root.
Specifically, Mr. Ng notes that stress related to performance expectations is a key factor in many mental health challenges.
Children and young people, in particular, often feel pressure to perform to their parents' expectations or to meet the perceived standards of their peers on social media. This can lead to a loss of unique identity and a sense of disconnection from one's true self, which can be a significant source of stress.
Mr. Ng suggests that meditation can be a helpful tool for those looking to address these challenges. By going deeper within themselves and letting go of ideas about other people's perceptions, individuals can find a sense of peace and acceptance that can help to reduce stress and promote mental well-being.
He stresses:
"I think we should try to address mental health issues at the root. And a lot of mental health, and I'm generalising, has got to do with the stress of performing to expectations.
“Children are under a lot of pressure to perform to their parents’ expectations. A lot of young people are now losing their unique identity and being overly concerned about what social media thinks of them. They're always trying to perform, acting. And that creates a lot of stress because they feel that they're not accepted as they are.
“A simple practice that meditation will help if you're able to go deeper within yourself, you know, and let go of your ideas about other people's perception of you, your lack of self-worth, and all that.
“So I think a simple practice [such as] meditation will help. If you're able to [...] let go of your ideas about other people's perception of you, your lack of self-worth and all that, I think you can find deep within yourself that you're a unique human being. You don't have to copy anybody else, you're unique.
“And then, you discover that you were created for a purpose, that you are equal before God. I think that gets the young person, as well as the person of any age, this sense of self-worth.”
Mr. Ng continues to address the stress and pressure that children in Singapore experience especially when it comes to national exams and education.
He points out, "It starts with their parents because the parents equip success with happiness. They want the children to be happy.
“But the idea is unless he gets a good job and gets good grades, he cannot be happy. Actually, it gives them a lot of stress, right?
“I feel that introducing meditation to children at a very young age is a life skill, which is very important. The earlier we start, the better because this kind of stress happens only when your children."
Ng Kok Song suggests celebrating mums instead of focusing on immigration to increase Singapore's birth rate
Singapore faces a significant challenge when it comes to population growth. With few natural resources and a need for a working population to support the economy, the government is exploring different strategies to achieve its population target.
To address this, Mr. Ng emphasises the need to encourage families to have more babies and suggests giving mothers more support. He shares that his personal experience also influenced his perspective, as his late wife chose to leave her job to care for their children.
He expresses:
"I think the most important thing to do is to encourage families to have more babies. And one of the things we should do is celebrate stay-at-home mothers who give up their jobs to care for their children because that is the greatest gift a mum can give to the children.
“My [late] wife did that. When our two older children were in primary school, and she decided that the children needed her more than a job; it was a personal decision.
“And I also have a great admiration for working mothers who hold down a responsible job, and yet are able to care for their children.”
Mr. Ng ends the interview by saying that supporting mothers is a country's investment.
“I think we need to celebrate the homemakers especially. I think it is an investment,” he declares.
“It's an investment for the future of Singapore to support mothers. I think that's much better than importing more people, right?"
Feature and lead images are from ngkoksong.official on Instagram and website.