When a mum decides to give away excess frozen breast milk (FBM), her intention is to help out other mums who may not be able to have a good supply of their own. This is a noble gesture, one only a mum can make. However, when a pervert starts harassing these mums, it is a really shameful thing.
As the report suggests, a buyer, using the user names 'Sandss' and 'Nookiak', approached different mums who were giving away excess FBM on Carousell. One of the mums innocently gave away 10 bags to him. The other mum dug deep and found out that the guy wanted it for his own consumption! If that is not disgusting enough, he asked if she would let him suckle it directly from her. He also sent her a photo of him consuming milk directly from a breastmilk storage bag.
These mums have since then reported him to Carousell and have taken to Social media. They are doing their fair share of warning other mums who are giving away their precious breastmilk. A friend of one of the mum posted a snapshot of the conversation she had with this man in a Facebook group and wrote, "Another mum on carousel just shared that this guy, named nookiak requested for her breastmilk, drank it himself, and took a photo of his pervert face and sent it to her! Please do not donate to him and waste your milk on people who don't deserve it! Our bm is liquid gold meant for babies! Please pass this message around to alert mummies who are not in this group as well."
As one would expect, there was a huge outcry against the pervert. Every reader wants to see this person behind bars. One of the Facebook members commented that this is a common practice in an oriental country and old men drink it as a cure for arthritis.
One of the mums who would like to remain anonymous responded to my inquiry and said, "I think it's very important that if any mummy would like to bless breast milk or even do any transaction that would require meet up, it's better to ask more questions and get to know the receiver. It is important to know what that someone is going to do with the breastmilk and for whom is it intended"
But this is not the only instance of perversion on the website. There have been instances where seemingly harmless users approach the seller and ask them to send them pictures in the merchandise. A lot of women who sell off their extra clothes have been a subject to this kind of perversion.
Read on to find out how to deal with this
How to deal with this
Unfortunately, there is no direct legal recourse for mums who face such harassment. Carousell responds quickly to requests to block such users, but they come back using different names. Here are a few things you can do to make your transactions safer on such sites.
1# Register using a generic photo and a username
Don't use your own photo for dealing on such websites. It is better to keep your identity safe while dealing with other buyers.
2# Use another number for dealing on such websites
People may get an access to your other Whatsapp profile using your number. If you deal on Carousell on a regular basis, it is better to have a different phone number than your personal one.
3# Meet up only when necessary
In one of the incidents reported on a news website, a user asked one of the sellers to engage sexually with him. It is better to keep people like these at bay by using mail. If it is breastmilk, instead of calling anyone at your home, you can meet up at an MRT station where there is a lot of surveillance.
4# Ask a lot of questions before giving away the precious breast milk
When someone contacts you regarding breastmilk, it is wise to ask a lot of questions to understand if the person is genuine or not. There are a few things only parents would know, so start with diapering stuff!
Even after all this, you may still have doubts. When you meet up, ask the person, even if it is a woman, to show you a few pictures of the person with the little one. Everyone has tonnes of such photos on their phones. So it should not be very difficult for a genuine buyer.
Stay safe mums! Apps like Carousell come handy when you need to sell off unwanted wares. Let the transactions not become a nightmare for you.