“If a married man can't keep himself from tumbling into bed with another woman—their child's nanny or not — that is not a reflection on the nannying profession but a reflection on the parties involved.”
Because of the extensive media coverage, nannies and babysitters get a bad rap for abuse and negligence, but perhaps the most popular slapped against them is their predisposition to home-wrecking.
After all, the news love scandals involving actors and public figures engaging in lascivious acts with their hired help.
There’s Jude Law, Ethan Hawke, Gavin Rossdale, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Mick Jagger, Ben Affleck, and countless others.
But this one nanny is tired of being portrayed in this unflattering light, and so she decided to come forward and break the stereotype.
Alessia Santoro is 25-years-old; she has been a nanny since she was 21, and she wants employers everywhere to know these things:
“Just because I’m younger than you and your husband doesn’t make me any less trustworthy”
Trust is one of the most important things to consider when getting a nanny, and one’s young age doesn’t necessarily detract her from trustworthiness and integrity.
“The thought that an attractive 20-something is somehow less trustworthy than a middle-aged woman who has raised her own family is completely flawed,” she argues, “as there are plenty of women in both camps who can be trusted and plenty who can’t.
“It takes two to tango”
First and foremost, affairs require two parties.
“If your husband can’t keep his hands off the nanny, that’s his problem,” she says. “The majority of nannies out there would never engage in that type of behaviour, provoked or not—nannying is about the kids.”
“Just because it’s not a job in an office doesn’t mean a nanny shouldn’t be considered a professional”
Nannies’ priority is to earn money, and although their office may not have the traditional cubicles and computer screens, they should be considered professionals to.
Alessia says: “I went to school for education and love working with children, plus everything in life costs money—those were my reasons for nannying, not because I was looking for an older, married boyfriend.”
“What a nanny wears and how a nanny smells will in no way be the only reasons your husband decides to pursue your nanny”
“I’m not going to refrain from wearing leggings or a tank top because they ‘entice men,’” says Alessia. “I believe in being appropriate, but for a job where I’m getting down on the floor to play, bending over to clean up toys, and getting spit up on, there’s no way I’m showing up in a pair of slacks and a button-down.”
At the core of this whole issue, there is an underlying issue about how the dynamic between nannies and employers operates.
The bottom line in this issue, Alessia says, is that women need to be looked at as professionals just as much as men; it doesn’t matter where and what their job is.
“If a married man can’t keep himself from tumbling into bed with another woman—their child’s nanny or not — that is not a reflection on the nannying profession but a reflection on the parties involved and, unfortunately, a result of the way women are viewed in society.”
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