13 reasons you should not feel intimidated by your in-laws
13 reasons you shouldn't feel intimidated by your in-laws
Your partner's parents should be treated like they're your own. Showering them with lots of love will bring about a more wholesome family unit. So stop feeling scared or threatened by them. They just want to be treated like family.
#1 Your in-laws just want the best for the both of you
Your in-laws probably love showering you and your partner with loads of advice only because they want the best for the both of you. There's no reason to be intimidated by the things that they say. You have to try to look at the bigger picture and you'll all get along better in the long run.
#2 They just want to feel included
The reason why your in-laws would want to drop by unannounced most of the time is probably because they feel like they're not being included in your family's busy lives. Give them a call or two every mid week just to keep them up to date with what's going on in the household.
#3 They want to get to know more about you
You shouldn't feel intimidated if your in-laws are asking you 'tough' questions about work or personal things you might not feel comfortable sharing. They are just trying to get to know you a little more.
#4 They genuinely want you to feel like you're part of the family
Not all mother-in-laws are monsters. Majority of them genuinely wants to make you feel like you belong in the family.
Give her chance in getting to know you and try your best to have some heart-to-heart chat with her. You might even find out some things in common -- like how much you both hate it when your partner leave his dirty laundry all over the bathroom floor.
#5 Assuming the worse about your in-laws will only stress out your partner
Some marriages end in divorce because of the 'incompatibility' of their partner with their in-laws. It is easier to give in and have respect for your partner's parents, than to cause stress in the family.
If you have problems with your in-laws, it's best to be direct and have a positive conversation with them and work towards resolving the issue like grown adults.
Your partner should also be present to be the 'catalyst' that calms everyone down.
#6 They are more experienced in life
Take notes from your parents and in-laws when it comes to bringing up a family and having a healthy marriage.
From years of experience, they can give you advice that might potentially save your marriage or help you in ways you never thought it would.
#7 They are knowledgeable and wise
With the years of experience they have, it's a good thing to have them around to teach your kids values and life lessons.
#8 They will eventually learn to love their son's no. 1 fan
It's every woman's dream to get along with their mother-in-law. Look for things in common that you might share with them. Most of the time, both parties would want to get along with each other. After all, your partner did choose you to spend the rest of his life with. So there should be a reason for your in-laws to love you just the way you are. Start communicating with them and be their best friend!
#9 They are the ones who raised your partner to be the person that he/she is
Respect them instead of being scared of them. They were the ones who raised your partner. So they should know your partner in ways you might not.
#10 They have big hearts
Sometimes you just have to look at them differently. They probably have the biggest hearts and are respectful and loving beings deep down.
Try to see it in your partner's perspective. They may get on your nerves every now and then but little things like trying to see it in your partner's perspective will help improve your relationship with your in-laws.
#11 They want to stay connected to their grandchildren
Your kids need their grandpa and grandma in their lives. If you're intimidated by them, you're most likely not going to like having them around your kids -- which isn't healthy at all.
Most of the time it may seem like they are dictating what's right for your family but take a deep breath and try to look at the bigger picture. If you're still not comfortable with how they spoil your kids, mention it to them nicely and make them see it in your point of view. Communication is always the key to having a happier family.
#12 They are just excited to be a part of your partner's new journey
Deep down, they are happy that their child has found someone to lean on. There's no need to feel pressured by their presence. At the end of the day, your partner chose you to spend the rest of his life with. They will truly accept you as their own child with time.
#13 They are family
Think of it this way: no matter how much you get angry at your Ma and Pa for nagging at you too much, you'll know that they'll always have your back.
It's basically the same with your in-laws. Even if they scare you sometimes, they'll always be there for you and your partner; because they're family.
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