Parents are not teaching their children better manners, one parent laments

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“Manners should be automatic and the only way that they will become so is if we as teachers show our children that manners matter.”

In this day and age, it is easy to forget the things that were once inherent parts of our lives, such as playing outside and reading a physical book.

But one parent feels as if parents these days are forgetting to teach an inherently fundamental thing to their children—manners.

“Of course I’m talking about saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. That’s the basics,” they said in their open letter on Motherish.

"But I’m also talking about table manners, social graces, generally just saying to the rest of the people living around you ‘Hey! I’m not a dick!”

They lamented that both parents and children fail to understand the importance of social graces and etiquette, however small and insignificant they may seem.

Like properly holding utensils, not picking noses in public, and abstinence from making snorting noises at the table.

“Please mums and dads, teach your children patience,” they pleaded. “Don’t let them continually interrupt a conversation and if they do need your attention, a simple ‘excuse me’ acknowledges the impact they’re had. It’s really not that hard.”

Manners, they further added, are a choice, a choice that we consciously make which represent ourselves, a way of being polite and civil and respectful.

They are not an outdated ideology.

Instead they are they are an “essential component of cohabiting with other people and interacting with courtesy and respect.”

Moreover, we demonstrate through simple manners our understanding of how our behavior affect those around us.

Failing to teach them this important discipline does them, in the long run, a disservice.

“As your child begins to spread their wings and explore relationships outside of the house, their social skills will fail them and their inability to be polite, to share, to wait their turn will impact their ability to form friendships."

The author of the piece also said that their children are not perfect, but that’s the beauty of childhood—it’s a time for learning important things that will equip them for the future.

“Manners should be automatic and the only way that they will become so is if we as teachers show our children through example and reminder that manners matter.”


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Written by

James Martinez