5 reasons NOT to have kids
In an article published by The New York Times, Nadia Taha provides some very compelling reasons why we should not have kids. We have decided to also provide some of our own reasons for and against having children and asked our readers reasons why they love being parents.
Major reasons NOT to have kids
Singapore's low birth rate has been a pressing concern for the Singapore government for many years now and one major reason is due to the fact that many couples are now choosing not to have children. Unlike older times where having children was part and parcel of marriage, this notion no longer holds true.
In fact, in an article published in The New York Times, Nadia Taha provides some very compelling reasons why we shouldn’t have kids.
Why we shouldn't have kids
1) Financial reasons
Nadia Taha argues that by choosing not to have children, one will be more financially secure. Nadia Taha also paints a grim picture of having kids by illustrating the large financial costs one would incur when one has kids. According to the latest annual report by the Singapore government, it is estimated that a couple earning an average salary will need $287,000 to raise a child after adjusting for inflation.
More financial reasons
However it is pointed out that the costs of raising a child is much higher than the figures provided above as they fail to factor in the opportunity costs involved as well as the continued costs incurred after the child grows up including college education. Also, rather than relying on children, buying insurance and taking care of oneself is a much more worthy investment for old age.
2) No more freedom
Having a child implies a heavy responsibility which requires a lot of commitment. You are no longer free to do whatever you want as you will now have to revolve your life around attending to every need of your kid.
3) A constant worry
Your child will be permanently weighing on your mind and you will find yourself constantly worrying about his or her welfare.
4) Cause for quarrels
Children can become a source of conflict between a couple particularly if both parents hold opposing views and schools of thought regarding the best way to raise a child.
5) Less sex
With all that time spent looking after the baby, you will probably be too tired to have sex. Furthermore sex becomes more troublesome as you need to find a babysitter before you can engage in some steamy action as there is just something inherently wrong about having sex in front of a baby.
Why we should have kids
Persuasive as Nadia's arguments are, theAsianparent.com highlights 3 reasons why we should have kids.
1. Life-fulfilling experience
Life is short and one should try to experience as many things as possible. Having children will becoming a life-fulfilling experience and enrich your life.
2. Money cannot buy you happiness
Money, although important, should not be the central focus of one's life. There is no point in having so much money if we don't have many loved ones to spend it on.
3. Strengthen your marriage
Having children can serve to strengthen a marriage by intensifying the relationship between the couple.
We have also decided to run a poll on our Facebook page asking our readers to share with us the joys of being a parents. We have received very insightful views which only comes when one becomes a parent.
Here are some of the reasons provided by our parents:
Cathryn Sim: “I love being a parent cos' children are physical manifestations of our love for each other marriage. We see in the children reflection of ourselves while we were young and still having a shared DNA from both parents.. This is the Highest Form of LOVE towards each other as husband and wife, other than the LOVE of GOD!!!”
Joyce Ng: “They give me unconditional love and make me realise I'm capable of unconditionally loving too. Sometimes the things they say makes more sense than adults'.”
Yun Huda: “Helps me to be a more responsible person & having a child is like the best medicine ever. N o matter how bad my day is or how sick i am, she will always be by my side to make me smile & put my gloomy mood away. It is the best feeling for me as a parent. :)”
Nurfal Love: “The smiles,hugs n kisses.especially expression words like 'love u mum','thank u' which show their inner tots can make our day..love my parenthood...”
Thilaga P Kumaran: “Not so sure of the reason...although I love my kids a lot. maybe the attention they pour on us....and the sense of belonging and we been their protector...actually it can't be expressed in words I guess :-)”
Nicholas Tan “As parent, the smile on our children is priceless. More often than not, we learn so much from our children, how to forgive, how to enjoy and most of all how to smile...”
Nouri Madina: “Coz I have a strong reason to work hard, to endure all the difficulties in life..they give me strength during the hard times.”
Irza SachaYong Travis: “After a hard day at work,the moment u reach home, they hug and kiss u..and the silly antics that make u smile and laugh..totally makes ur day.”