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It’s hard to be a parent. Juggling between work, home, personal goals, ambitions and giving your children the best can sometimes, take its toll.
But the worst part is when all that adds up and you end up shouting at your child, which you regret doing later on. We have all been there and done that, right?
While all parents flip out in front of the kids from time to time, sometimes the damage is done and you can’t really undo it. However, there are ways to prevent it and manage your anger better.
Here’s what you can do to short circuit your anger, control yourself when you are overwhelmed and not take the anger out on your precious little ones.
Nobody knows your body like you do, so the first step in the right direction could be watching your own body signals when those feelings of anger are starting to well up, tap the triggers and act before it gets out of control. Sometimes, walking off and taking a time out is better than having a big explosion. You can always come back cooler, more sane and respond more effectively.
Sit up, relax and evaluate where the problems are, sometimes drawing a road map ahead to fix the problems can help. Break the vicious circle of unresolved anger from the past; take steps to heal the anger.
Sometimes lack of inner peace is a big contributor to parental anger. Identify past and current situations around like lack of job satisfaction, issues with spouse, family and self. Let your emotions serve a purpose in the healthiest way both inwardly as well as outwardly, this would help you diffuse future flare-ups too.
Juggling between roles can be an exhausting thing for a parent. Take a break and spend some time doing something you love, relaxing and doing what you like most sometimes can be therapeutic.
It could be simple things like reading a book, talking a walk, listening to music or watching an all-time favourite movie. No matter how clichéd these things sound, they always work to get you back on track.
Anger is always a mix of accumulated feelings like stress, guilt, disappointment and even tiredness. If you can think which feelings are mixed up with anger, it can help you understand your triggers better.
Follow it up with talking it out to a family member you are close to, spouse, a friend or even children if they are old enough. Tell them how you feel without pointing fingers.
Communication is the key to all the relationships; talk as much as you want to take out vent up emotions or anger.
Not only will it make you feel lighter but also communicate your feelings to the other person in a positive manner.
Work on your anger as much as you can, right from the triggers to the source and situations. If you still feel it’s not helping, take the help of a counsellor.
Sometimes it may be appropriate to open up to a professional to seek help with anger issues. Recognising that there are anger issues and being open to solving them is half the battle one.
The only way to become the parent you want to be is to ‘parent’ yourself first, have greater control over your emotions, notice your feelings, staying connected with your children and finding you our own wisdom. Happy Parenting!
For Mum & Dad Gallery Parenting