Babies are NOT just babies

by Shelly Sim  
Filed under Baby, Baby Preparation

It is a common perception that babies do not know any better and that they are “just babies”. I say that the age-old concept couldn’t be further away from reality.

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I recall a time, not so long ago, when I was breastfeeding my month-old son while watching a movie on television. The scene was depicting a mother who was trying to pay a ransom to get her kidnapped child back. Fuelled by the lack of sleep and how overwhelmed I felt by Motherhood, I retorted to my suckling child: “If you were ever kidnapped, I won’t pay the ransom to get you back.”

My child pouted. And then he broke into full-blown wailing. It didn’t matter to him that my breast was still squirting out the glorious milk that was supposed to satisfy him, somehow what I said had disturbed him far more than his hunger could bother him.

I told him I was joking, just to appease his little mind. But he shot me a pensive look as if unsure if I was truly joking.

Then he went back to crying his poor little heart out.

As my husband laughed at the whole incredulity of the situation, I decided to take back my words. “Okay, alright. Even if it took a million dollars to get you back, Mommy will. Okay?”

The moment my sentence ended, all tears dried up and the boy showed me a gummy grin.

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Bear in mind, the little boy was only 6-weeks-old when this happened. There were no other factors that could possibly fuel his unhappiness, and less reason for him to do this whilst nursing. He had never broken off midway through a feed for all the time after he was born, and there was no reason he should suddenly do so, out of the blue.

Other than this unforgettable incident, there have been far too many events where he displayed full understanding of what is happening around him. This includes my conversations with his father, and he would find all means and ways to make himself heard.

On a separate occasion when he was 6-months-old, my boy refused his favourite diet of baby cereal, spitting out whatever was shoved into his mouth. Thinking he wanted a change in menu, I brought out his other favourite, pureed fruits. It was not well received either.

He yelled, screamed, kicked in his high throne, simply refusing to eat anything. And then I saw it: his tiny fist clenching and unclenching, doing the handsign for “milk”.

We had started teaching him baby signing days ago, and did not think he would have picked it up so soon. So just to confirm that he really wanted milk instead of a meal, I asked him if he was certain he wanted milk. He glared at me and shoved his fist into my face, all the while clenching and unclenching that little hand with a fervour I had never seen before.

I gave him that bottle even though it was dinnertime, and ever since then, have kept a keen eye on his hands in case he should be signing something and I overlook it again due to my short-sightedness.

Not Just A Kid

It was also this incident that finally woke me from the misconception that babies were “just babies”. They do have their personal preferences and sometimes they even know what they exactly want! They are definitely more than just babies. They are little people who will, one day, grow up to be just like us; adults with preferences in every aspect of their lives.

While we’re busy trying to decipher the elusive baby’s language of wails, screams, squeals and chuckles, we often overlook the simple fact that they are trying to behave just like us. Listen in closely and you’ll often hear them mimicking our usual adult responses of “hmm”, “huh” and “uh” in the most appropriate situations.

My child, now an inquisitive 1-year-old, ’says’ no by shaking his head, and yes by going “uh”. I don’t think any doctor has ever warned parents about this, but nodding our head requires much more skill than shaking it. So when you question your baby on anything in the near future (this is presuming you give them the freedom of choice in their daily lives), be sure to keep a keen ear to that possible “uh” that he or she might be replying with. Just because we’d like to believe that they “know nothing”, doesn’t mean that they are truly clueless!



(4 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)

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11 Responses to “Babies are NOT just babies”
  1. Henry Lim says:

    Well said.

    It’s my personal belief is that every baby is born with 100% potential.

    It’s only through our lack of understanding and our personal insistence on their conforming to our wishes that their potential diminishes each day.

    Hopefully, more parents will be able to accept their babies as a full-fledged individual – with an experiential sense that is probably bigger than we adults can possibly imagine.

  2. Kugen & Shamini says:

    Well we had some amazing moments like that too with our little daughter since she was 6 weeks too.. I think its the suppliments, milk and all that these days.. I think they really enhance brain developments.. Babies are incradibly smarter these days then they were back in our times…

    I think we modern parents, also engaged in modern way of bringing up… Routine scheduling, baby signs, baby programmes and loads more.. I think Human evolution is on the roadmap here.. we are truly evolving.. hahahahaha

    Kugen and Shamini

  3. Royst says:

    Wow…ur child is going to grow up to be very sensitive!

  4. Fring says:

    It’s all coincidence. Get real. Babies are just that, babies. they ARE not mini adults.

  5. Mary Tian says:

    Henry, I don’t think it’s coincidence that my 12month old girl is toilet train, knows how to signal to me that she need to wee / poo. and signal to say that she’s done. ? Coincidence? I do not think so, I think every bb / toddler has their potential. It’s every parents’ task to teach and guide them to the fullest potential.

  6. believer of baby sign says:

    Shelly, your baby is so cute!!
    I agree with you. For very young babies, even though they may not understand the words, they can pick up things like the tone of your voice and your moods.

    For me, i totally believe that baby sign language works too, coz we had been doing that with our girl and realise that at 7 months or so, she can sign for milk too. Signing has helped her to express what she wants.

    I don’t agree with Fring that it’s all just a coincidence. If you really ask around, there are just too many coincidences..

  7. Mary Tian says:

    Henry, I do not think it’s coincidence that my 12 month old girl signal to me whenever she wants to pee / poo. She will signal to me when she’s done. Is that coincidence? I do not think so, if she’s already 16 months and getting better to signal to me whenever there’s need to go to the toilet. I believe every BB/Todlers are born with potential, we parents are tasked to bring the best out of them.

  8. Mary Tian says:

    Henry, I do not think it’s coincidence that my 12 month old girl signal to me whenever she wants to pee / poo. She will signal to me when she’s done. Is that coincidence? I do not think so, if she’s already 16 months and getting better to signal to me whenever there’s need to go to the toilet. I believe every BB/Todlers are born with potential, we parents are tasked to bring the best out of them.

  9. Amulet says:

    agree!

    babies are born with their own set of personalities and knows what they wants..

    Like my near 5 months old baby, from 6 weeks onwards, she knows what she wants.. If she is full, she will refuse to feed further, stirring out the nipple with her tongue and scream until she is out of the breastfeeding position.. when people walk pass her, she will grin at us to carry her with her hands waving in the air, n scream if she doesnt get her way.. hahaa..

  10. Shelly says:

    Mary, I think you misread the comment. Fring was the one who said it’s all coincidence.

    I am glad to see that there are so many parents who agree with my new-age thinking! I have seen and experienced too many “coincidences” to be able to brush it off any longer.

  11. mamypoko says:

    totally agree with u~!! M son when he was 2month old he was happily playing with me when my mom came home and call his name he start to show her the pity look wanner her to pamper him..i even record it down…baby actually is smarter den adults cause they always get what they want hahahaha~and i got one time when he was 6month old i say if he naughty i dont let him go home…and from that day onwards he keep following me like scare i gonna throw him away…even if i tell him mommy not gonna leave you he still scare and even now he still wish to sleep with me…when i get up he will cry..kinda headache coz didnt want this to become his habit…

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